Ever since the wedding, I wanted to cleanse my life of anything wedding-related. It's like I woke up from some bridezilla spell and I returned to my uber-practical pre-wedding ways. Reading through bios was probably the single most helpful tool in my own planning since you get to see what real girls do, instead of some unattainable martha stewart-ified wedding concoction. And I was a total clueless bride once I got engaged- I had never heard of Monique L'huillier or chivari chairs and I thought non-engaged girls who read wedding magazines were freaks of nature. But by some miracle of God, I pulled off a wedding and got married. So here I am, two months after the wedding, creating this "bio" that will hopefully be a resource for future brides (and cool grooms).

Everyone says it and I'll just add to the chorus- our wedding was one of the happiest days of our lives. And it wasn't because the wedding was beautiful nor even because we put on a great party- we just felt so blessed to finally celebrate the day you get to marry the person you want to spend the rest of your life with. I think a lot of brides forget about that during the planning process.

Keep in mind that we tried our best to pull of this wedding on a graduate student shoestring budget. When we heard that average wedding costs were upwards of 30K, heads were going to roll. I was a nazi about minimizing costs but we allowed ourselves several splurges: letterpress invitations, alcohol (wine, beer, sangria, and signature drinks) and a sweet honeymoon. Other than that, we were able to throw a great party without breaking the bank.

Update: I started a wedding consultation service: kind of like a wedding-planner-lite. If you would like to contact me, please email me at greengelato@gmail.com or my blog at http://greengelato.blogspot.com. Please do not send me private messages via this website since I do not regularly visit it.

My husband and I met in China four years ago working as English teachers. Even though we lived a 7 hour ghetto train ride apart, we were somehow still willing to endure those crazy standing only rides, shoddy telephone connections, and yes, even the outbreak of SARS! We made a bunch of other expat friends, all of whom witnessed our budding romance.

Fast forward two years, I have lured this Michigander boy to Los Angeles where we are both on an eternal PhD track at UCLA. The day before he leaves for the Philippines to spend his summer working at an orphanage (heart of gold, that boy, sigh) he takes me out on final date to Duke's Malibu. Afterwards, he takes me to a cliff to take in the oceanview and while we're standing there, he points to a plastic bag lodged in a bush. What I thought was a piece of trash turns out to be a letterpressed Paper Source card with a puzzle drawn on it (I love puzzles). It turns out to be a phone number, I call it, and it's our Area Director from China! After catching up with her, she gives me the next puzzle which leads me to Zuma Beach.

After chasing around multiple puzzles and catching up with our old friends from China, our last clue lands us at the top of Zuma Canyon, overlooking the California coast. He carries me over a trail of rose petals and proposes (in French). That last picture is me calling my mom. :) How he had the time and patience to plant all those clues all over and even step inside of Paper Source is beyond me.

A little bit more about us via our save the dates.

Sticking to a tight budget also includes the unavoidable pricetag of your own patience and sanity as you hunt for ways to cut costs. A lot of girls place a high priority on keeping to one's budget (and rightfully so), but I think it needs to be said that spending a lot of time searching for a better deal is a huge cost in itself. That being said, it is possible to pull off an affordable, yet beautiful, wedding in pricey places like Los Angeles. My advice is to put your money in your reception site and photography- the rest are just details that will fade over time (if anybody notices them in the first place, that is). I remember when I obsessed over having either real glass martini glasses or plastic cups during my cocktail hour, and you know what? Nobody cares! I want to kick myself now for even losing 10 minutes of my life to that. On the other hand, it will become much easier to compromise on things as it gets closer to the wedding as costs just become random numbers mushing together.

Pictures tend to be unreliable, especially those you'll find in magazines. Higher end dress companies will have better photographs, which invariably make their dresses more beautiful. However, expensive dresses doesn't always mean "better", and conversely, buying a cheap dress doesn't mean it's a good deal. Different dresses complement different body types so I think it's good to try on a range of dresses, even in a style you would have never considered. When dress shopping, avoid buying your dress from posh stores b/c you will end up paying for their rental space and extra customer service. You can usually find a less expensive version of that dress online, in another store, etc. If going to a sample sale, go early and bring friends- the best dresses will always go first. And lastly, it's just a dress. In my opinion, I think it's the least important area to splurge on, but then again I'm no fashionista. Most people tend to think that "all wedding dresses look the same" (like me before I got engaged). But if it's your one obsession item (like me and letterpress), then go for it!

I love photography and I've done my research. As for the perennial digital vs. film debate, it should come down to whose images you prefer- it just depends on what you're drawn to. Our engagement photographer used film and our wedding photographer was digital. Since images straight out of a digital camera will always be subpar, the photographer should do a bit of post-production work on the photos- and you want to make sure that those edits are reflected in your digital high-res files. Digital images with good post-production work are often seen as superior to film because they have the ability to tinker with the image. But it really does just come down to shooting talent- some of the best wedding photographers still use film (like Jose Villa), but it's looking like photographers are going digital in hordes. Also, film is NOT more expensive than digital because digital photographers must spend hours upon hours post processing the photos. I've heard of digital wedding photographers doing no post-processing work- those people are a total sham. I've also heard (and met) with film photographers who criticize digital- those people are charlatans who do a major disservice to the wedding photography industry by confusing brides and disrespecting their colleagues.

You know how cheesy wedding photos in the 80s are so, well, cheesy? Well one day that will be us, my friends, because I really do think the current trend in oversaturating and washing out photos will be passe in a generation. I would recommend finding a true photojournalist, not someone who tries hard to be a fashion photographer. You want your wedding photos to document your day, and not reinterpreted through an artist's (however talented) eye. But that's just me.

Read photography blogs. That will give you a very good idea of what their "average" is rather than their "best", which is typically on their website. Also, don't be fooled by packages that have all sorts of bells and whistles. I've seen so many brides on the knot say things like, "I'm getting this many pictures, this and that, this and that for only this much!" But the photography sucks. If you had to choose between a great photographer plus an album versus an amazing photographer but no album, I'd go for the latter. But make sure to get your high-res files or negatives!!