Our Story - The Engagement & The Ring
- Last updated on November 10, 2012 at 12:55 am
- 1 comment
As I had said in my previous post, I have unfortunately been married twice before. Truly wrong person, place, and time on both accounts. Neither of those "idiots" and I am using that term nicely understood how to treat a woman. Both times the act of becoming engaged was modeled something like this "Let's get married" - "Ok" or "Well I guess we are getting married - "Um, ok I guess we are". No romance, no down on one knee, no expression of any feelings what so ever.
Now over the years thanks to modern television I have been introduced to story after story after story of how this couple had a "magical" engagement. Either it was a romantic weekend away, or whatever the case was. Our wedding industry today has made such a point of making us think there needs to be some dramatic event that takes place with when "The Question" is popped. Yes I understand it makes for great television but it is not realistic and quite frankly I believe it makes us forget about the importance behind it all. A man and a woman finding themselves not being able to live with out the other, loving one another so much that they want to spend the rest of their lives together through the good and not so good times.
Josh and I met at the end of May and had been inseperable, I knew he was "The One" after our first weekend together. As time went on, we had many discussions of our future together, but hey I didn't want to be in another relationship remember? I kept dismissing the conversations - I didn't want to get wrapped up too soon if that makes any sense. Maybe it was fear that I was rushing into yet another dead end relationship, I don't know. In August Josh mentioned us getting married which is when I honestly started looking at the possibility of there being a future for the two of us together. One day we were wrestling in the living room, one of the fun things we do and he asked me to marry him. With out thinking I said yes. What on earth was I thinking?! We had only been seeing each other three months! All I could think of was my mom flipping out on me and his parents giving him grief that we were rushing into this, and honestly as much as I knew he was the one I agreed. We talked and both agreed that we would take some more time and not rush into this, we both had made mistakes in the past neither of us wanted to repeat. If we were going to do it, we wanted it to be right.
Fast forward a few months to the holidays. We went to Pennsylvania to spend Turkey day with my family. While we were there with out my knowing Josh sat down and spoke with my mom about us getting married. He actually asked for her permission to marry me! Holy crap I have a man who actually gives a crap about my family! This was a first for me! I thought MAYBE he would propose at Christmas thanks to the bajillion ads we see around the holidays from the many jewelry stores. How romantic, but alas it didn't happen. Ok not a big deal. Then on December 30th 2011 it happened. We were having a nice evening at home. Relaxing together after a couple of weeks of the holiday hustle and bustle. We had just had dinner and decided to snuggle up on the couch and watch a movie together. Honestly I don't even remember what we watched, at any rate when the movie was over Josh started acting a little weird. He disappeared into the other room and came back and sat down on the couch next to me. He started talking about how happy he has been since we met, how it really wasn't supposed to happen the way it did but he was thrilled that the events of our relationship took place the way they did. There were some other things he talked about which I won't go into as to keep the moment private, but he pulled out a ring I had had for a long time. He said he knew it wasn't much as we were both in school full time living off of our financial aid and the GI Bill but there would be anothe ring at some point. Honestly I didn't care. I already knew of our financial situation and honestly I would have been really upset if he had gone out and spent a crap load of money we didn't have on an engagement ring. My answer of course was YES!!!! I want to spend the rest of my life with him.
When Josh proposed to me we were both full time 30 soemthing college students. Our income was very tiny (and still is). I had a bridal set that I purchased a long time ago (not sure why but I had gotten a great deal on it so I bought it). He used that ring as a temporary ring until something else could be afforded. It was a yellow gold and white gold ring with a round center stone and side diamonds. I didn't particularly care for the ring. The over all diamond count was small, not that that was a big deal to me I just didn't care for the yellow gold aspect of the ring.
We discussed what I liked and didn't like about different rings we looked at together. I wanted him to have a feel for my overall style and particularly that I wanted white gold. I always wear silver jewelry so this was important to me. On a whim we stopped by JCPenney's and looked at their jewelry selection (ok so I had scoped out the rings online first before we stopped by the store). JCPenney's carries real diamond jewelry but they also carry their brand of DiamonArt. They are lab created diamonds, simulated diamonds from the JCPenney jewelry collection. It has fewer inclusions that you would find in real diamonds so it is clearer than real diamond but looks just as nice if not better. According to their website the jewelry is created with the highest grade of simulated diamonds and perfectly cut to reflect the maximum amount of light and it is of the finest quality thanks to the patented polishing system of applying diamond dust to add more luster and shine.
We discussed looking at the jewelry (rings) simply because of our budget. We both agreed that while we would both like for me to have a real diamond it just wasn't in our budget at this time. So we went and looked at rings, I tried on a few for him to see but I did not pick out the ring. Ultimately the decision on what I was going to get was completely up to him. As much as I wanted to pick it, I didn't - I wanted it to be a surprise!
Here is my engagement ring and wedding band:
I absolutely love the design of my engagement ring. We have been talking about what we were going to do when the time came to get a ring with real diamonds. I am going to have a jeweler design a ring that looks exactly like this ring. This is the design style that Josh picked and I do not want to replace it with anything else otherwise I may as well have picked the ring out myself.