cant stop crying and shaking...
ok. this is going to be a long story and i wasnt orginally goign to post it, but you all have been so great to me for the last year and a half that i figured you will give me the best advice.
i am getting married on saturday to a great man. BUT i was terrified of his b-party because i didnt want him drinking to much, touching strippers, smoking pot etc...
i made it very clear to him if this, we even got into a fight a few weeks ago because i was so much against it. his party was on saturday and i stayed with my parents all day/and even spent the night at their house just so i wouldnt tihnk about what he was doing at that point.. he next day my brother comes and tells me my fi had 3 lap dances. igot so upset! finally i saw my fi and i asked him and he said he only had 1, then i said my brother said he had 3 and he admitted to the 3. he was very very wasted but didnt smoke pot. i coulnt belive that he had 3 lap dances. they also went to a number of clubs and he freaked with like 50 thousand girls!
i was so upset that i coudldnt even sleep in the same bed at him. in fact, i didnt sleep all night because everytime i closed my eyes i pictured him with some nasty ass hoe naked on top of him.
this morning i calmed down a bit.. and in the car on the way to work he tells me he touched the strippers asses and tits while they were giving him lap dances! then he tells me that they went back to one of the guys house and had ANOTHER FUCKING STRIPPPPER!
i have been crying and shaking non stop since i found all this out. i cant handle myself. i feel like he cheated on me. i feel like he knew how upset i would get and did it anyways. i can somewhat understand the dancing and the lap dances... but why did he have to touch them? why?
my wedding is in a week and i cant even look at him. he tried to kiss me on the cheeck this mroning and i couldnt do it. i dont know whats wrong with me. most girls wouldnt react this way. i feel i cant trust him. i tried and tried to talk to him about it but after one word i start balling and he gets mad at me.
what am i supposed to do now?
( sorry for the misspellings, i'm not up to correcting them)