hair and makeup anxiety

I had my trial with my hair and makeup artist last week, and I was really happy with the results.

But it took a few days to drag it out of FH that he was really freaked out by how drastically different I looked. I usually don't wear makeup, and when I do, it's really light. His main problem was that I didn't look the way I usually do. Well, DUH! It's our wedding day! I don't want to look like I just rolled out of bed!

It also makes me feel awful about the way I must look. I really felt pretty on the day of the trial, but then to have him react like that made me feel like there's no hope for me if professionally applied makeup and hair doesn't make me look attractive. :-(

So he wants me to do another trial, and he wants to be there. Which I think is weird. But it'd at least guarantee that he feels like he recognizes who he's marrying at the altar...

What would you do?
Posted on August 31, 2007 at 12:57 pm
chingermglish
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10/20/2007
chingermglish

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(14) Comments

moemarsita
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07/06/2008
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Have you talked with your photographer about it? It seems like that would also be a priority in the makeup. Honestly, in my opinion, it's one day and you're going to be in a white gown (I assume). So you're not going to look "normal" you're going to look dressed up and bridal. He's going to be wearing a tux (I assume again). So maybe tell him to keep that in mind and maybe the makeup won't stand out as much as it would in your day-to-day garb.
Posted on August 31, 2007 at 1:57 pm
sarahmkruse
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12/15/2007
sarahmkruse

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sarahmkruse

I understand how you feel. I normally dont wear a lot of makeup and I always am running into the same problem. My husband is used to seeing me with little or no makeup. Maybe you could try toning down the make up you had done or try playing up one area, (eyes, lips, etc.)
Posted on August 31, 2007 at 2:12 pm
franieliu
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11/11/2007
franieliu

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franieliu

I'm sure you looked gorgeous, but the groom-to-be was probably just more used to the way you look without all the make-up. You can discuss this with your make-up artist & see what she (or he) recommends. You can let her know that you don't want to look too different, so maybe go for a more natural look. Make-up artists are professionals & they must have different brides who want all kinds of different style, so I'm sure your make-up artist will come up with a look that's going to make both you & your FI feel comfortable. Just talk to her & if she's ok to do another trial with your FI there, you should have no problem finding that PERFECT look together! You'll look & feel BEAUTIFUL on your wedding day!!!! Good luck!!! ;)
Posted on August 31, 2007 at 4:20 pm
married2mrwright
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09/29/2007
married2mrwright

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married2mrwright

Do you have any pictures of the make-up look you're going for? Here's a photo campaign of brides and the make-up is very natural. Also, remember that make-up has too be a little heavier for photos...you and your FI are probably not used to that at all. That said, you can have a full face of make-up and it can still look pretty natural.


This bride, for example:



BEFORE


AFTER


She has a lot of make-up on, but it looks natural. She has foundation, powder, eye shadow, mascara, eyeliner, blush, lipstick and lip gloss. But the colors are pretty neutral and not far from her natural colorings.


Have you talked to your makeup artist about making you up to looking you on your best, most relaxed and well-rested day? That could mean making your complexion look flawless with some well match foundation and powder. Some peachy blush, and neutral eyeshadows...brown black mascara and dark brown eyeliner. If you want to skip the eyeliner, it will look less "made-up" but be sure your make-up artist balances your eyes with your mouth. Also a lot of natural flattery can be added to your face can be done with simple highlight and contouring powders. I suggest collecting some pics of the look you like and take it from there...


Here some more pics:

























And here is a more "glammed" up look, that still is soft and natural looking:










Posted on August 31, 2007 at 5:22 pm
margaret
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09/22/2007
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margaret

I agree with previous posts. It's your big day and I think everyone expects you to look special and different from your everyday look. When my friend got married in college, she looked so GORGEOUS with all the hair and makeup, which was very different from her everyday look but looked VERY natural. It was like she was a princess. =) I wish there was a class that could teach you how to look that good everyday!
Posted on September 1, 2007 at 5:24 am
mariegalapon
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10/06/2007
mariegalapon

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mariegalapon

I agree with everyone...you're make-up was probably gorgeous...your FI was just not used to it becuase of everyday life looks, but you're supposed to look gorgeous on your wedding day....also, do try for the natural look...the pictures posted above is great...
will you post pics. of your next make up trial....? if you don't mind...
Posted on September 1, 2007 at 8:48 am
chingermglish
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10/20/2007
chingermglish

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chingermglish

Thanks everyone for all your feedback & support, and special thanks to Lori for finding all those wonderful pics! I especially love the before- and after-photos of the bride. My trial look was a blend of the first couple of semi-glam pics, and seeing it among all the other examples, I can see where FH might have been a bit shocked to see me look like that all of a sudden...

Thankfully, my makeup/hair artist is really supportive and helpful, and our photographer is a friend of mine, so I'll try to get some feedback from him before we go for the second trial. :-)

It's just amazing to me how fixed an idea FH has of the way I "should" look. Also, I have friends whose BFs get worried whenever they get hair cuts because they don't want to see too drastic a change. Is this a typical male thing? ;-)

Happy long weekend to everyone!
Posted on September 1, 2007 at 1:03 pm
zanylany
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03/07/2007
zanylany

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zanylany

My FI likes it better when I don't wear makeup too. I guess it depends on the guy. I agree with previous posts that wearing a lot of makeup on your wedding is great as long as the coloring is natural and you look good!
Posted on September 2, 2007 at 4:07 am
married2mrwright
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09/29/2007
married2mrwright

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married2mrwright

Glad I could be of help...if you basically never wear make-up then going for a GLAM look would be a stark contrast. If you liked how it looked, then I say go for it! BUT, if you really didn't look like yourself then consider a lighter color palette that is more "natural". I think we all want to be GORGEOUS on our wedding day, but we want to look the ourselves, not some major extreme makeover where we hardly recognize ourselves in the pics. Maybe that's what your FI was getting at...he wants to see YOU! So maybe your make-up artist can use colors that are similar to your own natural ones, just pumped up a bit?

As for guys in general, yeah, I think it IS a guy thing! My FI prefers me in NO make-up and long hair that's not pulled back or necessarily style...I gues WILD woman is his thing! And I have friends too who decided to get short hair cuts and their guys initially flipped! I don't know what it is about men and long hair! Of course, afterwhile, they adjusted to it, but sheesh! What if we had a hissy fit because they shaved their goatee or beard off! LOL
Posted on September 2, 2007 at 7:31 am
sarahmkruse
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12/15/2007
sarahmkruse

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sarahmkruse

My hubby is the same way... he loves the au natural look....
Posted on September 3, 2007 at 2:06 pm
its.nicsknack
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08/31/2008
its.nicsknack

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its.nicsknack

Yes....I'm 100% with PP! There are so many ways to have a beautifully made face with a very natural look. Guys can be funny about make-up. Typically they're not fans. You also have to think of the whole picture...you in your gown, veil (if you have one), flowers, the whole ambiance, etc.
Posted on September 4, 2007 at 6:33 am
SFAug07
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08/24/2007
SFAug07

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Funny, my husband loved my look and it was a bit more dramatic...I actually asked for dramatic eye make up so that I look different than every day. I was very happy with the look too...
Posted on September 10, 2007 at 4:45 am
chingermglish
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10/20/2007
chingermglish

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chingermglish

Just a follow-up:

We just had our second trial! Meaganne (our hair and makeup artist extraordinaire) was so great and helpful in helping us with this second look. Photos of before, after, and hair are in my bio. I didn't post the first trial because I looked half asleep, but the feel was more glam than the second.

FH says he really likes the second one, but that if I wanted to do the first look and use false eyelashes, he'd support my decision and wouldn't say anything.

I'd rather have him look at me the way he did today, than the way he looked at me after the first trial. So I'm going to stick with the second look. ;-) I'm just glad that things are working out!
Posted on October 4, 2007 at 5:22 pm
tahoegirl
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09/02/2007
tahoegirl

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tahoegirl

This might be a silly idea... but if you are set on getting professional make-up for the wedding... have you thought of wearing a little more on a day-to-day basis before the wedding so that you both get more accustomed to you in make-up? Don't pile it on... but maybe for going out use a little eye-liner and lipstick, or for going to work it's a light, sheer foundation... whatever you don't normally wear, just try it out a bit and see what you like.

I don't usually wear a huge amount of make-up either... So for me it was eye-liner... i went to a couple make-up trials and they each used eye-liner on my lower lids. It definitely looked just "different" to me and my DH, but i knew it would make a huge difference in photos, making my eyes look much bigger I ended up using a soft-brown on a daily basis before the wedding just to get used to it. Now i love it and wear it all the time. :) And it looked great in my photos. :)
Posted on October 7, 2007 at 8:46 am

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