How to Include Kids in Ceremony?

i'm trying to figure out how to include fh's son in our ceremony and am thinking about the 3 of us doing the sand ceremony...

is this too cheeseball???

last year when fh's ex-wife remarried, their son rec'd the "family medallion" during their ceremony... so i dont want to do that - but still want to do something symbolic...

please throw any other suggestions in the hat!!!! =)


p.s. i'm terrified and excited to be a "step-mom"
Posted on May 17, 2008 at 8:49 pm
d1rtymart1n1
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(13) Comments

ceejaydee7
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I think the sand ceremony is cute! we were thinkin about doing it too! AND u have a keepsake after!
Posted on May 18, 2008 at 9:08 am
d1rtymart1n1
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ok stupid question--- should we ask him if he wants to or just tell him we are having a sand ceremony... i dont want to discount his feelings - and i def dont want him to think i'm tryin to be his mama... i mean i hope he knows i want to be another adult figure he can lean on - not necessarily take the place of his mom...
Posted on May 18, 2008 at 11:58 am
Chrissy
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06/27/2009
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May be a stupid question but what is a sand ceremony?? I am looking to include my nieces somehow who are 9 and 10 by then and dont want them to be Junior B/M's for a few reasons, so I am trying to do things with them too, like maybe a private photo session with them for like 15 minutes before the wedding..Its so hard to try to include everyone you want to right?? How old is he?
Posted on May 18, 2008 at 12:04 pm
d1rtymart1n1
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my (future) stepson will be 10 by next august...

he is also a gm...

not a stupid question - i didnt know what the sand ceremony was either until miss mandy told me...

http://www.marryu.com/sand-ceremony.htm


a private photo session would be awesome!! they'd feel like such superstars i'm sure!!
Posted on May 18, 2008 at 12:16 pm
Chrissy
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Oh yeah that cool, never seen that before. So he is a gm that is good right?
Posted on May 18, 2008 at 12:49 pm
d1rtymart1n1
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he is a little shy at first, so no matter how the other gms and bms "match up" according to height or whatever - we're going to have him walk with fh's sister - so at least he'll be comfortable...
Posted on May 18, 2008 at 12:57 pm
beautifulpwwedding
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beautifulpwwedding

Comment has been removed by Project Wedding due to a violation of our Terms of Use
Posted on May 19, 2008 at 5:25 am
Chica
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I think only you and FI should do the sand ceremony. Since he is already a gm, maybe you can have him do a reading at the church. My step son is 8 years old and I've been debating the same. He's not a gm, since he and my 3 year old will be the only kids at the wedding and there aren't any little girls in my family that I wanted in my wedding party. haha. So he is either going to be a second ring bearer and walk w/my son (who won't dare let him touch the pillow) or have him carry a "Here comes the bride" scroll.
Posted on May 19, 2008 at 6:27 am
d1rtymart1n1
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the more i think aobut it - i think fh should ask his son what he's comfortable doing - his son is kinda shy at first, so i doubt he will want to do a reading, he's a pretty laid back and mellow kid and doesnt like too much attention...  well, it's over a year away - so maybe it'll just work it self out before then... but you know me - i'm spazzy and just want to know how everything is going to be... ;)

Posted on May 19, 2008 at 7:24 am
SunsetHawaiiWeddings
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SunsetHawaiiWeddings














The Sand Ceremony



  

THE SAND CEREMONY represents leaving two separate lives and joining to make one life together. The separate lives are symbolized by two vases of sand, in different colors. The Bride and Groom come together, and pour into one vase, two individual colors of sand. Their flowing together creates a design made by the couple as they share their first experience of unity as husband and wife. The newly formed union is represented by the intertwined pattern of sand created by the couple. This symbol is then a keepsake of their wedding day.



Jorge and Lorraine


At our first interview, I found out that this couple met on a beach. The sand ceremony was perfect for them. Not only that, but each was bringing two children into the marriage. When I asked them what was most important to them about the ceremony, they said they wanted everyone to know how they overcame obstacles to be together, and they also wanted their guests to know that as of this, their wedding day, they have blended two families into one.


I asked the children, “What’s your favorite color?” When they told me, I got packages of sand in each of the four colors. Jorge and Lorraine wanted natural sand, from the beach, to commemorate their first meeting. The children came up to the table where the four small vases, filled with colored sand, surrounded the large vase where the sand would be poured, blended into one and taken home as a keepsake and memento of this beautiful ceremony and important day.


As each one of the children, (from the eldest to the youngest) poured their individual vases of sand into the ‘unity vase’, the sand formed a wondrous pattern, much like a lava lamp, with undulating colors and patterns. After the children poured their sand, mom and dad added theirs as well.


How did the sand ceremony affect this occasion? When the photographer was getting ready to snap the first after-ceremony shot of the blended family, three of them yelled, “La arena, la arena”, ‘the sand, the sand.” They didn’t want to take their first picture without the perfect symbol of their now blended families – their vase of colorful sand.


Posted on June 15, 2008 at 1:53 pm
chowbaby
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There was a posting on that long indiebride thread that detailed one family's inclusion of there children, where the parents sat down and read to their children a modified version of Green Eggs and Ham (We will love you in a box.  We will love you with a fox.  We will love you here or there.  We will love you anywhere...).  Super cute.


This won't work so well with a 10/11 year old, but maybe you could figure out another way to demonstrate your & your FI's commitment to your FI's son?  Like "vows" from you/your FI to your children?

Posted on June 15, 2008 at 2:20 pm
joesfuturewife
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We are incorporating our kids into the service..My son (9) will be 10 at the wedding, he is giving me away since both of my parents are deceased.. our son and daughter will be the ring bearer and flowergirl..they will be 6 and 5 at the time of the wedding..then we will all do the sand ceremony..

Posted on June 19, 2008 at 5:21 am
kpn
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D1rty - I think you should include him for a few reasons.  Not only does the sand ceremony unit the both of you as husband and wife, it would be uniting him as part of the entire family.  I have seen where people have included children in the unity candle, so I would definitely do the Sand - plus you can have him pick his color to make him feel important. AND - it is a keepsake like what was said above.  A very nice reminder of how he is now connected with you and his dad!!


Be like NIKE - and just  DOOOOOO ITTTTT!!!!!!  (how cheesey was that!?) hahah

Posted on June 19, 2008 at 5:37 am

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