I need advice from my awesome PW girls!

Hi ladies! Okay this is a touchy subject, so I thought who better to get advice from than all of you! When your involved in a situation it's easy for us to let emotions get the best of us, so I figured maybe someone on the outside looking in could help:


Lets say I have this friend. Who is very polite and sweet to our faces but trashes us behind our backs and says they will not be coming to our wedding. The truth is I couldn't care less. It's a silly, selfish reason why they don't want to come...apparently they are unhappy to not have a role in the wedding. It is just a friend, who I've known since childhood...we're just not super close since the last 6 or 7 years and with our bridal party consisting of ALL family and 2 VERY best friends personally, I don't see a big deal. Plus, the guy vs gal ratio would be uneven. AND I was going to have a small role for this person, but when I heard all the trash I was like ummm...NEVERMIND! The problem for me is people in my wedding party are also friendly with this person. So I have a hard time "calling them out" because I don't want to "create waves". Even though I'm a very vocal person!


Do I:


A: Say...sooooo when were you going to tell me to my face that you weren't coming to my wedding? (That way I don't waste my money sending an invite when I don't even want her/him there because of the nasty things being said.


B: Just ignore it and send an invite and pretend my friends didn't tell me, send an invite knowing they won't come so that I gave them the option and I'm keeping the peace with everyone.


I know normally I would tell the person your a 2 faced biotch, but I'm so happy with my life right now I JUST DON'T CARE! People who do that are insecure so it actually makes me feel bad for them.


How would you girls handle it? Sorry this is SO long! Love ya gals!!!! TIA :)

Posted on June 26, 2008 at 10:35 am
m824
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m824

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(15) Comments

d1rtymart1n1
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12/04/2009
d1rtymart1n1

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sing the song with me!!  (sung to the tune of "C is for Cookie")


"B is for Beeyotch - that's good enough for me"


dude - seriously i dont know why people wanna show their asses when wedding time or inheritance time rolls around... whatevs - be the bigger person and send her an invite but keep on truckin!!!


 

Posted on June 26, 2008 at 10:38 am
Niki
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I'd do B.  She isn't worth the time and effort that A would take.  And by refusing to get caught up in the drama, you'll come out of this looking good.

Posted on June 26, 2008 at 10:40 am
m824
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08/24/2008
m824

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hahahhaahhahahaaaaaaaaaaa d1rty! Thanks!I'm a great actress..I guess two can play at the "I'm a FAKE ASS B*tch game"!


love the song! I'll just keep playing it over and over in my head when It starts to piss me off! :)

Posted on June 26, 2008 at 10:41 am
caribear
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05/18/2008
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I second dirty! 

Posted on June 26, 2008 at 10:41 am
m824
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08/24/2008
m824

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ALRIGHT!!!!!!!!!! Thanks ladies! I was ready to come out with gloves on but your all ABSOLUTELY right! ty ty ty ty! I feel as if a weight has been lifted from my shoulders...I've been thinking a lot lately about what to do! :)

Posted on June 26, 2008 at 10:42 am
Chica
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My vote is for "b", let that stay on her conscience, not yours.

Posted on June 26, 2008 at 10:45 am
jharks
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10/11/2008
jharks

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Yep, B. Don't stoop to her level either by talking about her with your other friends.

Posted on June 26, 2008 at 10:47 am
MissQnomore
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B.


for all the reasons peeps said, and b/c you keep your mutual friends out of the drama. (cuz ya know she's just gonna go back to them and b*tch about why they told you)

Posted on June 26, 2008 at 10:58 am
SandP09
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03/14/2009
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I agree with the rest of the girls. B.


 


She's not worth your energy. Take this as a lesson and know that she is a not a real friend and now you know better. If she doesn't come to your wedding- that's one less person you have to pay for!

Posted on June 26, 2008 at 11:01 am
m824
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m824

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Wow, thanks ladies! I'm really feeling better about this! I guess the only problem I had with B was I felt I was being fake...but there is no shame in being the bigger person!


* And actually missq - the exact words that were told to my friends were "You can tell that B**** I'm not going to her wedding. Don't be a pussy and not tell her!" (It was a drunken rant! :) Which actually made me giggle because all of our thoughts were Why don't you not be a pussy and tell me yourself! heehee oh, some people:)

Posted on June 26, 2008 at 11:02 am
MissQnomore
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omg! sheesh. 


yes there is no shame in being the bigger person.  and it obviously doesn't take much to do that with this one....lol

Posted on June 26, 2008 at 11:27 am
JustAnothrBridezilla
4
09/13/2008

JustAnothrBridezilla

A would feel good right now but B will feel even better later on.  So I second B although I understand how tempting A is.  I wanna A to my BM. But I'm goignto B for a while...hahaha lingo...

Posted on June 26, 2008 at 11:41 am
HolyMolyMatrimony
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HolyMolyMatrimony

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Yah, I had an 'issue' a couple months back with someone that is coming to our wedding and her FI is our GM- I was nice and just simply told her my feelings (no bitching out or anything) and haven't heard from her since.  I always think communicating is key- but sometimes it doesn't really work out like that? Wierd...


I would want to say something soooo bad though if I was in your shoes though- in a nice way of course to make her feel like an idiot for being so disrespectful... but then again you could wind up like me? haha


- HMM :)

Posted on June 26, 2008 at 11:45 am
m824
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Thanks again ladies, this is SO theraputic!


Justanotherbriezilla- I KNOW how you feel! A is VERY tempting!


HMM - That sucks:( I hate drama...In a perfect world I would LOVE LOVE to communicate in a civil way to this person. But she is VERY manipulative, would probably lie and deny a problem, then lie to everyone else about what I said. Which would be okay, because everyone knows how this person is and just lets it go so there's no drama.... And winding up in your postition wouldn't be so bad;) I would just not want to make the situation awkward for others involoved.


OH WELL...we're all getting married :):) planning beautiful weddings, and going to be spending the rest of our lives with our dream guys! GO US and screw all the other selfish, jealous insecure people around us! 

Posted on June 26, 2008 at 11:53 am
SandP09
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Amen to that!! :)

Posted on June 26, 2008 at 11:55 am

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