invitation disaster

I just finished hand making 100 invitations for our wedding in June. I love them and I am really proud of them. It was a two day project, but I am thankful I undertook it. They are exactly what I wanted them to be.

I didn't want to mess them up, so before I started I did tons of research on proper layouts. When it came to the parents names, I came to understand that proper form means you include the parents names that are paying for the wedding, and if the bride and groom are paying for it themselves, no parents are mentioned. Well, I am fortunate enough that my father is paying for everything. So when I wrote out the invites, I only included his name.

My future in laws are livid that I didn't include them. I love them, and didn't mean to insult them by any means. I was just following proper form.

Should I explain to them my reasoning and hope they get past it, or just bite the bullet and remake all of the invites?
Posted on February 14, 2013 at 11:49 am
thefuturemrshumphrey
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(10) Comments

Uhlease
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09/02/2012
Uhlease

Uhlease

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Uhlease

Oh man. That is a sucky situation! Did you explain to them why you did it that way? Maybe they will understand because making that many over again sounds awful :( What does your fiance think? I think following that etiquette is fine. Let us know how it goes and what you decide :)

Posted on February 14, 2013 at 12:15 pm
alyciamarlene
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07/23/2011
alyciamarlene

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alyciamarlene

Sometimes proper etiquette can get so tricky! Darn you etiquette! Have you tried to explain to them why you only included your father's name? 


When we did ours we chose to include both of our parents names even though we paid for everything just to avoid a sticky situation. I hope everything works out for you - please let us know! 

Posted on February 14, 2013 at 12:47 pm
IdoAgain20years
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02/20/2018
IdoAgain20years

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IdoAgain20years

I would explain ettiquette and then explain that it is the HOSTS names that go on the invitation. If they were hosting the wedding then you would be happy to add their names.


Most people know this without explanation.


I am sorry they are being difficult. You could have your husband-to-be explain that it used only ever be the brides parents on the invites because they were the only ones hosting which is the case for you.


 


 

Posted on February 14, 2013 at 2:12 pm
beccabride
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10/10/2010
beccabride

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beccabride

I agree with the other ladies about explaining this to your future in-laws.  If you think that FI might be able to make her understand the proper etiquette for this, then I would have him do so. 


I'm sorry that they are acting this way, but your father is paying for the wedding and he is the actual host.  (((hugs))). 

Posted on February 15, 2013 at 12:04 am
NicoleJuliette
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11/12/2011
NicoleJuliette

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Agreed, I would sit with them and explain. It's not only the time that you'll have to take re-doing this. But, it is also the cost of it.


Agreed with Becca, your Dad is hosting, and I am a sucker for etiquette.

Posted on February 15, 2013 at 12:14 am
leni8
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leni8

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wow that is a tough situation! Glad we don't have these issues here as we always put the names of both the parents of the groom and the bride!


All the ladies seem to agree on talking to them, so hope that goes well! 


But if it does not and they still have bad fillings then personaly -if it was not to expencive-I would re-do them. From my side such thinks that are easily fixable are not worth the fight. 

Posted on February 15, 2013 at 3:17 am
DansMrs
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DansMrs

I would just sit them down and gently explain why you went about it the way you did. Are they hosting the RD? That would be their time to be on the invite. 


Sorry you're going through this, like Alycia said, etiquette can get so tricky!

Posted on February 15, 2013 at 4:05 am
MrsCaleYoung
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06/30/2012
MrsCaleYoung

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So sorry you are going through this! All the above ladies gave you great input. Have you had a chance to speak with them yet? 

Posted on February 18, 2013 at 3:48 am
clipscomb1987
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clipscomb1987

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clipscomb1987

Heckkkk no i wouldnt remake them. Just apologize for the miscommunication and say you were following etiquette!  In the same aspect with etiquette considering your dad is footing the entire bill wouldnt it be rude to him to put someone elses name on the invite when they are not paying for the wedding? 


if your inlaws are going to be mad and resentful at the wedding bc of this, then your bound to have issues in the future- so i would just let it go lol  


Good Luck! 

Posted on February 24, 2013 at 1:30 am
Kszczes
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Ugh! What a pain! Etiquette is SO tricky! I agree that I think I would try to talk to them and just explain that you weren't trying to offend anyone, just did what you thought was right. I think it would be very unfair for them to make you re-do all of your hard word so hopefully they understand. Good luck! Keep us posted!

Posted on February 24, 2013 at 3:18 am

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