is it bad to cuss in your vows?

Okay not really...but I am having a hard time writing my vows...and I sit here and type...and delete...and type and delete...I feel like everything is really cheesy....So I have tried writing...and just talking outloud...it all sounds cheesy and not from the heart?


Any suggestions? and if you wrote/or are writing you vows...where did you find inspiration?
Posted on March 30, 2008 at 8:00 pm
lukduck
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05/17/2008
lukduck

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(5) Comments

theDame
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01/01/2008
theDame

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theDame

F#ck yeah! ; )

ok, How about looking for inspiration in: the story of how you met, why you're marrying him, how you knew he was the one, the proposal- anything quirky or unique that he does for you or reasons why you love him that might not be the typical reasons. Those would be the usual ways to look for things to say.

maybe there's a sweet or funny anecdote or story you can tell about your lives together

If that fails- what about incorporating sayings about love or marriage (there was a quote thread last week) or quotes from movies..?

hth
Posted on March 31, 2008 at 2:21 am
married2mrwright
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09/29/2007
married2mrwright

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married2mrwright

We wrote our own vows and based them upon text of books that have helped us grow in our relationship. We emailed them back and forth to each other(isn't THAT romantic?) until we had everything we wanted to say in there. We did this over the course of a month. Wrote. Talked. Edited. Repeat. Until it was exactly what we wanted to say to each other.



I will say, that for a civil ceremony, ours are probably considered long. But I didn't care, we wanted our vows, to be meaningful and to state our intentions for life. And we wanted our ceremony to hold the emphasis of the day...often times a beach/outdoor ceremony is like 5 minute and then it's all about the party. For us, it was about the ceremony (although the party was great)! We printed the vows in 20 pt. font and I had them mounted in the book of the entire ceremony text that we created for our officiant (who is one of our best friends and she married us)...that way we could read them to each other with some ease:




Bride/Groom, on this day, I promise to be your best friend and loving partner in marriage. Together, we will share all of the triumphs and challenges that life may bring. I commit to the friendship upon which our love is based, and promise that I will consciously renew this commitment daily, so that our partnership in marriage will always be strengthened.



I promise to communicate with you patiently, expressing myself openly and honestly, while respecting your unique individuality and view of the world. I will not make assumptions; if I do not understand, I will ask.
In a difficult situation, I will look upon my own contribution to it rather than cast judgment upon you and will offer you acceptance, rather than criticism. When I am wrong, I will offer amends and when I have been wronged, I will offer forgiveness. I will continue to seek personal growth as an individual, so that I may always bring the best of myself to our relationship.



As your husband/wife, I promise to encourage your dreams and goals, celebrate your accomplishments and embrace you in all of your endeavors, come what may. I will honor your trust in me and put our marriage above all outside influences. I will build a home with you that will be a peaceful and safe place that provides us comfort and is a refuge from the world. I will make time each day to laugh with you and promise to always greet you with a kiss and a smile. Things will not always be perfect or easy, but with God's help and our commitment to each other, I will love you without condition, support you without reservation, comfort you with compassion and stand by your side through all of our joys and sorrows, today, tomorrow and for all the days of my life.



The best advice I can give is to write, write and write some more. I actually started with just journaling. Why I wanted to marry my FI? What about our relationship did I cherish most? What were the things we had to work on to get to where we were currently? What did I think our challenges in marriage would be? What would I want him to say to me in our vows? Just start asking yourself questions and write. No need to worry about grammar or how cheezy the answers are. Then, the next day or so, go back over your notes and see if there is a some sort of theme or grouping of ideas. Also, remember that as long as they are truly from the heart and filled with intention, that's all that matters. They do not have to be the most eloquent thing you've ever written.
Posted on March 31, 2008 at 2:52 am
jhuffman22
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08/08/2008
jhuffman22

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Wow lori...your vows are beautiful!
Posted on March 31, 2008 at 3:54 am
jersey
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04/25/2008
jersey

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jersey

use lori's ; )!!!hahaha jk. lori they are beautiful!
Posted on March 31, 2008 at 4:05 am
MarinBride
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04/05/2008
MarinBride

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I had trouble at first too, but what always works for me when I have writer's block is to just keep writing, no matter how bad it seems. Eventually you'll loosen up, and then you can go back and delete the stupid parts!
Posted on March 31, 2008 at 4:46 am

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