Is it ok for the man to leave 100% of the wedding planning to the girl?

I know some guys who are totally disinterested in wedding preparations and have decided to leave all the planning to the girl. Do you think this is acceptable?
Posted on March 9, 2007 at 4:39 am
sammo
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(15) Comments

margaret
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09/22/2007
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I personally would hope that the guy would help out a little bit. I mean... he cares about marrying me right? I actually wish my FI would help out more *ahem* JOE!!!

Guys are typically in charge of stuff like music/entertainment, videographer, and honeymoon. Pretty much stuff that doesn't impact the overall look and feel. LOL.

My guy is in charge of 5 things: the Texas reception location, videographer, music/entertainment, rehearsal dinner, and honeymoon. So far I've done 2/5, and he's done 0/5. =P
Posted on March 9, 2007 at 4:53 am
margaret
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I shouldn't knock Joe that much though. He comes to all the consultations with me (but doesn't talk much). Most of the vendors are usually very surprised that he's there! For example, how many guys interview the photog and go dress shopping with their fiance?

He's a good Joe. =)
Posted on March 9, 2007 at 4:57 am
Bonnie
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My FI actually does a lot of planning. I feel very grateful that he is so involved!
Posted on March 9, 2007 at 1:10 pm
JadeGirl
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03/07/2007
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HA! My hubby just showered and put on a tux. I did everything else.
Posted on March 9, 2007 at 7:17 pm
sammo
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Thanks for the feedback everyone! I just wanted to gauge the female attitudes for expectations on male contributions to wedding prep. Quite honestly, I'm one of those guys who secretly hopes he won't have to do any wedding planning, though I know it's wishful thinking.

Have you ever seen the Michelob commercial where the announcer says "If you had nothing to do with planning your wedding, then you're a Michelob man."?

Well I'm not going to go that far. I think I'd be okay with just the music/entertainment, videographer, and honeymoon as Margaret said Joe is.
Posted on March 13, 2007 at 5:49 pm
rosyw
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My husband was very involved in the wedding planning. He went to all appointments with me except for the dress & alteration appts. He even went to 3 bridal faires with me. He helped to pick out the invitations (Precious Moments on the back his idea), decided on our favors & favor boxes & bow, picked out the chair cover sashes (2 colors his idea) helped make the DIY wedding cake card box, and assembled programs. He booked the DJ but I did a lot of the research too.
Posted on April 12, 2007 at 4:26 pm
johnandjanet
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My husband did a few things, but most of the planning was done by myself. It would have helped to have a very involved groom like rosy and I definitely would have appreciated the effort. We had a great day though so I'm happy.
Posted on April 14, 2007 at 6:43 am
*Wil*
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I'm forcing my FI to be involved (which I may regret one day). I ask his opinions and am asking him to take on some of the research tasks that I don't have the time or energy to handle.

I also want him to be involved because it's our day and not my day. I'm not sure it would be about us if we both weren't involved.

Ask me again in 12 months :)
Posted on April 14, 2007 at 5:38 pm
*Wil*
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It also depends on the girl. Some don't want their FI to have anything to do with it. If she doesn't want him involved then it must be ok.
Posted on April 14, 2007 at 5:39 pm
Kristen
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08/22/2009
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hahaha, "he's a good Joe."

Yeah, I'd like to think the guy would help out with some things. Or at least coordinate with you so that you could get your expections on the same page since it's supposed to be for both of you.
Posted on April 16, 2007 at 12:16 pm
MrsBabySalute
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That's what my DH did. He only wrote checks for me and left the rest of the planning up to me! =) I asked him for his opinions and every time, he would say to me: "Whatever makes you happy, baby!" OK then!
Posted on April 30, 2007 at 7:09 pm
cacdelacruz
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09/01/2007
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It's funny. I also gave my fiance his 'assignments", much as others have mentioned- music, buying the booze, honeymoon, transportation- but after a while he was taking toooooo long to get stuff done that I finally had to take some of the tasks over! I'm trying to get my 'control issues' under control though and have been totally hands off with the honeymoon planning. It's hard though! hehe
Posted on July 3, 2007 at 7:10 pm
MrsBabySalute
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How come guys don't want to be involved? It's just as much their wedding as it is ours!
Posted on July 3, 2007 at 8:05 pm
married2mrwright
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09/29/2007
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My FI has been pretty supportive and we are planning together, but I am doing most of grunt work. He has his opinions about things and luckily, we pretty much agree on everything. I had to talk him into OOT bags, but that was more of a money thing. We have the same taste and sense of style, so no struggles there...I basically narrow everything down to 2-3 choices and he helps me decide from there.

Now that we're in the home stretch (less than 3 months) he is getting really excited (as am I) and has more opinions about things wedding-related. And he's started calling eveything wedding-related "nuptial _____" Too funny! Like "my nuptial suit" or "nuptial shoes"...hilarious!

Brides LOVE to complain about FI's who don't help, but trust me...there is NOTHING worse than a GROOMzilla! I have been involved with TWO weddings where the guys did most of the planning...EEK! MAJOR drama!
Posted on July 3, 2007 at 9:18 pm
mzjoym
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09/02/2007
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I'm doing most of the planning. However, I involved him in all the vendor interviews and making the final decision.

I also gave him assignments that I know he will enjoy. Like our music list, taking care of wedding day transportation, corresponding with his GM regarding their roles and their wedding day attires and researching activities for our honeymoon.
Posted on July 4, 2007 at 8:37 am

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