Not inviting coworkers

So I recently started a new job. I love what I do and I like my coworkers. The problem is that they all seem to be under the impression that they are invited to my wedding. The guest list is already set and due to our location and budget, we cannot invite a bunch of extra people (our ceremony and reception is in the same place, so if people have to be invited to both). I don't talk about the wedding, but I do answer questions when they ask. Just yesterday, I gave an invitation for a work event I was planning to an employee and she thought it was a wedding invitation! So do I just ignore their little hints and hope they get the picture or do I say something, which might come off rude?
Posted on September 26, 2007 at 8:26 am
Jenice32
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11/04/2007
Jenice32

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(7) Comments

moemarsita
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07/06/2008
moemarsita

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moemarsita

That is tough. If they bring it up, you can politely say something about how nice it would be to have them all there, but are limited to only including family and close friends. I have also started to give really short answers when I get the barrage of wedding planning questions.
Posted on September 26, 2007 at 9:09 am
abattyref
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10/06/2007
abattyref

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abattyref

Yeah, that's is a tough situation. I've been at my job for over a year and I didn't invite any co-workers. My rule was if we hang out outside of work, then I consider you a friend and you'll be invited. If not, then we just don't have enough room. If co-workers starting asking when the invitations are going out, just politely say, "We just don't have the space to invite co-workers too. If we could, I've invited all of you."

The chicken in me says to just ignore it and they'll get the hint when they don't get an invitation. ;-)

It also helps to do what moemarsita mentioned, when they start asking wedding planning questions, make them short and sweet and then change the subject.

Good luck!
Posted on September 26, 2007 at 10:48 am
Jenice32
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11/04/2007
Jenice32

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Thanks for the advice. I talked to one of my coworkers about how I was feeling and she suggested having a get together with the coworkers after the wedding. I think we'll try and do that.
Posted on September 26, 2007 at 11:50 am
*Wil*
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03/25/2008
*Wil*

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*Wil*

Put a sign on your desk..."You're Not Invited" I think they'll get the point then :)

kidding...but wouldn't it be nice.
Posted on September 26, 2007 at 2:02 pm
sarahmkruse
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12/15/2007
sarahmkruse

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I just dont really worry about it too much. I like the people I work with, but I am not that close to them. Sheesh I am only having 30 peeps!
Posted on September 26, 2007 at 3:34 pm
srini
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I wasn't hurt when my boss didn't invite me to his wedding - relieved, really :)
Posted on September 26, 2007 at 7:17 pm
lapartieevents
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lapartieevents

I'm glad you said something to your co-worker. Hopefully, she'll spread the word for you. :) You definitely shouldn't feel bad about not inviting co-workers. I had to let one co-worker know that she wasn't invited to my wedding after she put it on her calendar without ever being invited. She actually took it well and understood. Honesty is always the best policy and it sounds like you're handling it very well. We planned a picnic catered by the In-N-Out truck the day after our wedding and invited everyone we could think of (and specifically asked people not to bring gifts). I actually think people liked it more than the wedding! :) Meg www.lapartieevents.com
Posted on September 28, 2007 at 12:51 pm

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