NWR: Would you rather...

would you rather


a) raise your kids in the suburbs. lots of neighbors, big schools. Riding bikes on the sidewalk, playing soccer, video games, etc.


b) raise your kids in the country (5mins from a small town, 30 mins to major city). Some neighbors, but spaced out. Smaller schools. Lots of room to run and play and breathe fresh air and get dirty and be a kid. Ride the pony in the backyard, help dad fix fences and drive the tractor.

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 3:16 am
amandrew
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(47) Comments

midnyteblue110609
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11/06/2009
midnyteblue110609

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A ---> but then again i am from NYC and have always been a city girl and B kinda scares me, lol.

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 3:17 am
jackieg
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04/17/2009
jackieg

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A - grew up in Iowa, but definitely not a country girl....i want to raise my kid in CA, going to the beaches on weekends, going snowboarding at Big Bear or Mammoth in the winter....

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 3:17 am
melissarae0504
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11/06/2009
melissarae0504

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A

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 3:18 am
MissyJean
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B!

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 3:18 am
mrsKC1
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09/04/2010

mrsKC1

A... and I know my FI would say B.


Lol.. I was born in Iowa and raised in Cleveland, He was born in Fort Lauderdale and raised in a tiny country town. :-)

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 3:21 am
jackieg
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how funny...3 girls from Iowa out of the 5 responders so far....  :)

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 3:23 am
M.Robinson
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09/05/2009
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Hmm this is really hard... I lived in the country until I was 18 and then I moved to Long Island...


The hardest thing about growing up in the country is that you have no close neighbors, your friends dont live up the street... my closest neighbor was about 1 mile away.... what was good about living in the country was that you knew pretty much everyone you went to school with because it was such a small town...


Now as a grown up I MISS the country but as a child, I think it's important that they are able to socialize... living in the country, it's very hard to do that... I feel like I missed out on a lot of my childhood.


 

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 3:23 am
Lilivati
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I hate the suburbs.  They are cultureless incubators perpetuated by middle-class parents who are unconsciously scared shitless by the idea that if their children are less than superkids they will slide back into poverty.  I prefer living in a community, not an overgrown creche, so of the choices listed I would pick B.


Just my opinion of course.  Others are more than entitled to disagree.

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 3:23 am
nathomps
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B.....I am a country girl at heart!


I grew up in a small town where everyone knows your name! I live in Toronto for 4 years and hated the feeling of a big city.


DH is a city boy though.....we slightly (i mean alot) disagree on where we will raise our children!

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 3:23 am
swags97
3
09/12/2009

swags97

Option -B- all the way...I loved every minute of my country childhood.

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 3:25 am
midnyteblue110609
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midnyteblue110609

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wow, you feel quite strongly about that Lilivati.  the way you answered that question was kind of scary ... looks like you have thought about it a lot. 

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 3:26 am
corky6565
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a - i love the community feel, thats how i grew up and  our neighbors were (and are still) dear friends and a great support system

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 3:26 am
miss_em2010
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wow lilivati...that's kinda painting everyone with the same brush, no?


last time I checked not every person who lived in a suburb was "cultureless", "middle class" or "scared that their children will slide into poverty"....that's a pretty bold statement to make!

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 3:29 am
amandrew
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Fi and I have selfish reasons for wanting to a place with land. I have horses, he likes to dove hunt. Neither of us likes being smooshed with lots of people or fighting traffic. We both really prefer a simple, country way of life. We want our kids to go to cowboy church and grow up knowing how to take care of yourself and your property, and not be afraid to sweat and work and get dirty. We're trying to consider it from FK (future kiddo's) point of view though. ;)


Even if we lived out, they would still be involved in some kind of "social" sport in town.. soccer, baseball/softball, riding competitions, etc. We just don't want kids that feel lonely or sheltered or like they're missing out on important life experiences.

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 3:31 am
ginag
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A :)

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 3:32 am
Lilivati
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Hehe Midnyte- I DO feel extremely strongly about it.  I hated where I grew up in suburbia.  It was trying so hard to make "perfect children" and it damaged so many kids.  We didn't know any of our neighbors because there was absolutely no interest in forming relationships outside the nuclear family.  Everyone was out for their own- it was the best public high school in the state, and people took it completely for granted...accomplishments, like winning a competition, were never celebrated, they were merely expected, and failure was condemned..."good try" didn't exist here.  If you weren't standing on top of the heap you were worthless.  And then the community itself- EVERYTHING revolved around kids' activities and successes and failures- and that's not really a community.  Where are the grandparents, the young couples?  There was no culture or community activities, except maybe in the churches, because it was all about showing off, not coming together.


And I honestly thought this was normal until I got out.  You couldn't pay me to raise kids there.

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 3:33 am
M.Robinson
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It sounds like you would enjoy the country better then

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 3:33 am
erindira
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JackieG, would Ames be considered a suburb or the country? Lol. When I hear suburb, I imagine most people mean a smaller community just outside of a major city like Chicago. Yet people call Ames, IA a "suburb" of Des Moines since our capital city is the biggest "city" in Iowa.


Ideally, I'd like to live just outside of a medium-sized town/city like Ames so we can enjoy the country but still have neighbors and be close to activities in Ames and still more to do in Des Moines. So...B would be the answer I guess.

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 3:39 am
meanyprice
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A: but I'm from Arkansas, so I don't know that my area with neighbors and bigger schools would actaully be 'suburbs' since all of the cities and town are so small.  I grew up in the country outside of a very small town.  There were 35 people in my highschool graduating class.  I agree with M.Robinson about the social aspect of country living.  It's harder have the close friendships in the country that occur in neighborhoods because there isn't that contact between kids. 


Also, around here, the variance in quality of education/class offerings is very large in A vs. B.  (And Arkansas is toward the bottom of the list in the US in quality to begin with.)  In the B situation, only the minumum requirements are offered due to budget constraints, so there isn't an opportunity for learning beyond the basics.  Because of the small class sizes, many classes are only offered once, and the education is geared to make sure the bottom students pass standardized testing, which doesn't challenge the top students.  In the A schools, there are more class offerings, so the students who would like to take more challenging classes are able to do so.  I went to a school in the B situation and graduated within the top few of my highschool class, and went I got to college, I was very far behind the others I was starting college with, those that went to school in A situations.  I want my kids to be a little better equipped for college than I was.

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 3:41 am
midnyteblue110609
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Lilivati: i've never lived in the suburbs.  i was a city child all my life.  when i went to school in Plattsburgh NY i was suprised with how friendly everyone was.  to me, the suburbs did appear to be a community where people got along, all the kids knew each other by first and last name (in the city we didn't do that, way too many names to remember), etc.  i highly doubt many of them were wealthy or even middle class or really worried about their children becoming poor.  i think the "community" you lived in sounds a lot different than many communities in the suburb across the country, but then again i wasn't raised in one so i can't be 100% certain. 

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 3:43 am
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