The Bridesmaid Chronicles-Firing a bridesmaid

Hi ladies! Don't get me wrong. I have no intentions on having any issues with my chosen ladies, however, I also know that sometimes it's inevitable. Have you ever had to or thought of firing a bridesmaid? Yesterday I contemplated it. Our first wedding meeting with the entire wedding party was held yesterday afternoon. Notifications went out in advance after everyone confirmed they could make it-February 18th to be exact. On Saturday, reminders were sent out and at that time everyone confirmed. Well... 15 minutes prior to the meeting, I get a text from one of my bridesmaids that said her boyfriend, who lives out of state, came in town to surprise her (which I'd read on Facebook the night prior) and she probably wouldn't make the meeting because they were going to get something to eat. **blank stare** Really? Well why couldn't he come along it was only a hour? If anything, she could have at least shown up and they could have eaten at the meeting or gone out afterwards. Or even stopped by for a few to introduce herself to everyone else and grab a bit of info. I dunno, to me that just made me feel like my meeting/event wasn't important enough and I don't want anyone like that standing up there with me. Now I do know that things happen and that things could change at any moment but I am feeling some type of way about this one. Please give me some feedback ladies! What would you do???
Posted on March 10, 2014 at 2:47 am
MrsT2B
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11/07/2014
MrsT2B

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(6) Comments

AshandTrev
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05/30/2015
AshandTrev

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 Id probably be pretty annoyed also. At the same time I dont feel its a big enough issue to kick her out of the wedding and potentially ruin a friendship. Id wait and make sure its not a reacurring situation before you say anything to her. Hopefully it was just a one time thing and from now on she will be able to make every get together. I'd probably just try to brush it off! 
If it happens again, I would definetly say something to her. Ask if there is a reason she doesn't want to be coming to the meetings. Explain why you think its important for her to be there. Im sure it will all work out! Good luck! 

Posted on March 10, 2014 at 11:59 am
Bridetobe102014
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10/18/2014
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Bridetobe102014

I actually "fired" my MOH. There has been some issues there for a while but I figured I could get through them, and we could do the wedding stuff. Well when I got engaged she wasn't excited but I still asked her, first strick. Her husband is.... lets just say we dont get alone but I did for her, well the first outing for my gown he wouldn't leave her alone, and she couldn't enjoy herself, which put her in a funk that day. Well then I planned a girls day so we could go try on dresses for them. Did it a month or more before, and even sent reminds that week before. Well, the day of she didn't show, and one of the other girls text her and asked if she was coming, she had forgotten all about it, AND didn't even make an effort to show. I didn't feel important to her so a much needed but hard decision was made.
Posted on March 10, 2014 at 12:59 pm
Uhlease
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09/02/2012
Uhlease

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Uhlease

I think the biggest things a lot of us here have learned while wedding planning is that unfortunately our wedding is only top priority for us. Which is understandable. We cant expect people to be as excited for us as we are!  I would have definitely been sad if a bm did that to me, but does she not see her bf that often? She probably wanted to spend as much time with him as she could. Although, if she was a good enough friend, I agree with you, she could have brought him for an hour. But I wouldn't use this as a means to 'fire' her. We all do things mainly thinking of ourselves, and this just happen to fall in bad timing :( If she continues to flake out and not be there for you, that could mean something, but I would try to let it go this time. She could probably be filled in on the happenings by all of you :)

Posted on March 10, 2014 at 1:45 pm
MrsT2B
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11/07/2014
MrsT2B

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Thank you ladies and yes I am guilty of believing everyone should have MY wedding at the top of their list of priorities but I know that's not the case. I have to considered that her bf lives out of state and it's a fairly new relationship. She's safe this time but I was LIVID! I'm over it now. I appreciate everyone's input. Have a fabulous week!
Posted on March 10, 2014 at 4:22 pm
MnP2013
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04/18/2014
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 Yep I fired one n just made her a guest of honor n another one backed out shortly after I fired the first one.. The one I fired is still my best friend. The one that backed out .. We don't talk anymore.. She just ended things like that... I was ok with it. *shrugs*

Posted on March 19, 2014 at 10:17 am
holly_marie_53
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03/06/2014
holly_marie_53

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 I was so blessed with such a wonderful bridal party! I believe that a key part is definitly keeping it relatively small! I only had 3 girls and they were awesome about everyting!!

Posted on March 19, 2014 at 12:29 pm

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