Wedding Without Friends??

Is anyone else going through this? I have absolutely no friends. It's ok, just the way it is. Anyway, because of this, I won't have any at my wedding. It's kind of a tad bit sad, but like I said, it's just the way it is.


Am I the only one not having any friends at their weding? Just curious.

Posted on July 17, 2008 at 3:37 pm
TheChicBride
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(28) Comments

SunsetHawaiiWeddings
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SunsetHawaiiWeddings

We had 100 guests. I invited old friends... My sisters were there and I asked them to be my bridesmaids and I invited my friend visiting from where I live to be my MOH. I was at her daughters birth and I love her, but we never spend time together accept in social circles... Even though we had 100 guests, I felt like I had no friends. I did not have a Bridal Shower. I was not close to my sisters at the time. I knew I would be again someday... I think we go through fazes in our lives where we have friends and we do not. Family and old friends were our guests. Oh and my husband seems to have a lot of good old friends...

Posted on July 17, 2008 at 3:54 pm
TheChicBride
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Sunset..I'm not having a bridal shower either. I literally have not had any friends since 2001. Even though I have dealt with it and have come to grips with the fact that this is just the way things are, it would be nice to have some friends enjoy this special day.

Posted on July 17, 2008 at 3:57 pm
SunsetHawaiiWeddings
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I was a bit sad too.. I was happy for my husbands friends, they were all so nice. I really wanted a GF to share in getting ready and the support of being close to some one besides my love on that day. I wished my sisters and I were closer at the time. My mom did so much she was too busy to be by my side. I wish I had an instant best friend to send you. I know I really wanted that. I never spoke of it to anyone. Thank you for sharing.

Posted on July 17, 2008 at 4:07 pm
TheChicBride
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Thank you for sharing your story with me as well.

Posted on July 17, 2008 at 4:09 pm
JustAnothrBridezilla
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09/13/2008

JustAnothrBridezilla

i used to be such the social butterfly but in the last few years with a crazy school schedual then graduating then getting enageged and moving further away it seems like I have no friends too.  But I invited old friends who I still keep in touch with.

Posted on July 17, 2008 at 4:14 pm
mrs.carlo1934
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I'm also not having any friends at my wedding.  Everyone is either a friend or family member of my FI.  There will only be 2 neighbors that have seen me grow up that will be there.  Planning this wedding has been bittersweet because I really don't have a girlfriend to share it with.  When I went dress shopping I went with my FMIL and it wasn't as much fun.  So I understand you totally! 


ChicBride check your pm!

Posted on July 18, 2008 at 4:58 am
jessiepilot
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I am so glad that you decided to post this. I am kind of in the same situation. I have freinds but they are "work" freinds, and while I do value them I don't really see them a whole lot outside of work. I don't have a sister or a close female freind. Because we are only having 30 guests at our wedding, and because of the size of his family, I was unable to invite any of my work freinds.


I do have a neighbor coming and a few other people that have been freinds of my parents, and as I got older mine, for a really long time (15+ years) but they are my parents age. There are some people our age coming, but they are his cousins and not people I grew up with or are totally close to.


I went dress shopping with my mom and dad and I was soooo glad they were there - plus because I lack a true "girlfreind" my mom and I have had a chance to start working through some of our weirdness with each other - so really it's been good to have to rely on her.

Posted on July 18, 2008 at 5:12 am
jharks
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yep, I am with you. I have a few close friends, but I have always been a "best friend" person, not a large group (I usually had a best friend who was part of a large group so I was by association) I was just never willing to make the effort.... FI on the other hand, has TONS of friends (all on the East Cost though sadly). I was so sad looking at our part of the guest list, he has like 2/3 of the people on it and he has a B list. My three closest friends are bridesmaids and after them, there is a huge drop off... ok getting sad thinking about it :-(


BUT, my extended family is big, so I have never felt like there were not enough people in my life. Just remember, you have the man of your dreams, he is you best friend, so you do have friends at the wedding :-)


Love!

Posted on July 18, 2008 at 5:25 am
TheChicBride
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Thank you all for sharing. At least I know I am not in this alone.


It is also sad that there were a few people that I thought I was getting close with and making friends with. Some people who I thought that maybe I could invite to the wedding if our friendships progressed, but lately, I never hear from them. They will communicate with each other frequently, but not with me. Oh well, I guess it wasn't meant to be.


Anywhoo, thanks ladies. Like I said, at least I know I am not alone in this.


Happy Planning everyone!!! :0)

Posted on July 18, 2008 at 6:42 am
txbride08
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All my friends are cyber friends! I don't know anyone where I live so I'm in the same boat...its okay though sometimes your "friends" can ruin your special day.

Posted on July 18, 2008 at 8:08 am
Chrissy
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06/27/2009
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I know over the years I have def. lost a lot of friends.  Some moved some went different ways, but its not about friends, its about people your family, fiance, coworkers.  I know I have 4 girl friends and sadly none but one is truly a friend at heart.  There is jealuosly all around, especially since I have gotten engaged.  Its very sad and also hard to deal with at times.  All I know is at this point I almost dont want a wedding party.  I feel like I am just hanging on to them for the sake of the wedding.  I am always the one trying to initiate the plans.  I am even starting to think something might be wrong with me, because its hard for me to make new friends b/c everyone is set in life and dont want new friends!!! Hang in there I know how u feel.  

Posted on July 18, 2008 at 1:27 pm
SunsetHawaiiWeddings
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SunsetHawaiiWeddings

This is a good post.

Posted on July 18, 2008 at 1:45 pm
SandP09
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I think it's the sad truth about getting older. When I was younger, I had so many "friends". And the older you get, the more you realize who your true friends really are. Slowly but surely, people start trickling off. I have certainly lost a fair share of friends over the past few years. Some of which I thought I would be friends with forever. But people grow apart, things get in the way, but life goes on. The ones that remain behind are the real friends. I always say that having girlfriends is like juggling 15 boyfriends at once. It's hard to maintain a personal life with your husband/fi/children and friends at the same time. I recently "lost" a friend that I never thought I would. But harsh reality set in and I realize she was not much of a friend to begin with. It makes me sad because we shared history together, but I know that I don't want or need negative people in my life. People will come in and out of your life- but just remember they're all for a reason. Hang in there...you're getting married to your best friend and that's all you really need.

Posted on July 18, 2008 at 1:50 pm
SunsetHawaiiWeddings
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I had my first child at 21.. He is turning 18 this week... My friends just did not understand. They thought I just disappeared... I went to collage as a single mom and really did not have a connection with the other  people, because I was a parent. Just a different thing. I changed due to health reasons and went on the healthy path with organic foods and herbs. I met people who had potlucks and ate healthy food and were into music. This is where I met my husband. We had a baby and moved to Maui. I have friends here, but it is the parent thing. Every one is busy with taking children to school and meeting up at birthday party's. Birthday parties in Hawaii are all day events and so I have a lot of friends I see just at the birthdays... by the time my husband and I got married my old friends started having children and husbands and wanted to reconnect. They apologized saying they just didn't understand what I was doing. Now they are as busy as I was and really do not have the time to get together, besides they are all over now. Alaska, Seattle, California just moved around with their husbands. I am happy to go to the beach, help my brides and listen to my husbands music. Being a parent the second time around I do not do all the running around. We have other students come and do school at my house. I miss having girlfriends to connect with. I have my husband and we are best friends. He is amazing and beautiful and brilliant and a rock star... Not a real rock star but he is a musician, performer and music producer. He would probably be doing the rock star thing if he wasn't so busy being a great father and giving me sooo much attention. Anyways, I think the time will come when I have real girlfriends again. Right now the women who come around usually just like my man... women are funny that way.

Posted on July 18, 2008 at 2:21 pm
mrs.carlo1934
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You know it's funny but as soonas I announced I was engaged my so called friends became my enemies.   As long as I was in bad relationships and having problems they were there but not during the happiest time of my life.  They also didn't understand how life changes when you have children because they had none and they also don't have stable relationships.  It makes me sad not to have someone to share things with but at the same time I feel like a big burden has been lifted off my shoulders.  I don't need negative people around me.

Posted on July 18, 2008 at 6:25 pm
d1rtymart1n1
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ahem - i'm here!!  i know i know i'ts not IRL... but still...


i think people in our lives come and go b/c at that time - we gave each other what each needed and wanted - but then life moves on, people change etc - and that's just life.. i recently had to let go of a decades-long friendship (you all know this) and while it was a bit heartbreaking - i was sad b/c i was losing history - but not really someone i'd like to make more memories with kwim?? so in that respect, i wasnt so "sad".


i can count on one hand the "real" friends i have kept from elementary school 'til now.


for the most part - i'm cool with how things are... friends come and go, but i will always have myself... yes i am going to have the hubbs - but heaven forbid if something ever happened - i still have myself...


mrscarlo is right tho - no need for negative energy - they jsut drain the energy and bleed our patience til there isnt any left...

Posted on July 18, 2008 at 6:36 pm
TheChicBride
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TheChicBride

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I think it is just really hard for me because I am a stay-at-home mom of a 5 year old. DH works and goes to school, so I am basically alone with my daughter 24/7.


I love my daughter dearly, but I can only talk about animals, colors, cartoons etc so much. It is soooo hard not having any adult interaction.

Posted on July 18, 2008 at 6:40 pm
d1rtymart1n1
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d1rtymart1n1

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call me when youre bored!! i work form home and aside from the wait-person at the restaurant, and daily conf calls at 11am - i have no interaction!  i swear i have diarrhea of the mouth whenever i'm out and about b/c i no longer work in an office with real people, with a real receptionist; i cant just walk in someone's office to shoot the sh!t...


 

Posted on July 18, 2008 at 6:50 pm
TheChicBride
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TheChicBride

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try talking about doggies, cats, monkey's, chicken nuggets, Wall E and Kung Fu Panda for 12 hours a day. Sometimes I just want to bash my head in..lol

Posted on July 18, 2008 at 6:56 pm
d1rtymart1n1
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d1rtymart1n1

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omg!!! hahahahahaha!!!!


whyyyyyy do i have to be allergic to wine??? i'd loooove to be sippin on something right now!! hahahaha


 


 

Posted on July 18, 2008 at 7:15 pm
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