What would you do? Long... sorry.
So, out of the blue, I got a call today from a friend with whom I haven't spoken to in almost 4 years. She and I have known each other since kindergarden and we were major BFFs all the way through high school. Our younger sisters were BFFs, and our moms were BFFs too, so we were always together. After high school we remained friends and kind of went our separate ways but still kept in touch. After her mom passed away from a long illness, she fell on some hard times and needed a place to live. My parents happily took her in. She met a great guy (whom she's marrying) and my parents saw less and less of her. Finally she fell off the radar for a couple of years. Never returned phone calls, and she'd show up to pick up her mail once a month when no one was home. In early 2005, I finally called and left a message saying that we're cleaning out the garage, if you want your stuff come and get it. If you don't we're giving it away. She came by and we chatted like old times. Then I never heard from her again. We never had a big fight or anything, she just cut herself off from us.
Originally, I took it personally, but I eventually came to the conclusion in my heart that I wasn't ever going to see her again. I tried to keep a connection with no success. I was able to know where she was and what she was up to through another friend. So, I knew that she got engaged last year. And I'm sure she knew that I got married last year. I would have invited her if I had an address.
Today we talked for about half an hour catching up. She said she really misses me and wants to get together to catch up. Oh, and she's getting married next Thursday afternoon, can I make it?
The wedding in the the Bay Area, I live in Long Beach. Money isn't an issue as I can fly using DH's flight benefits. The dilemma I have is whether to burn 2 vacation days for this. I only have 4 left this year. I'd really love to be there for her, and I will do my best to try and stay in contact with her now that she's called again. But I can't help but think, was I an afterthought? It's next week for goodness sake!! My friend, who happens to be a therapist, said this, "Personally, I'm all about honoring your own feelings rather than just pleasing another person."
What would you do? Thank you ladies.