~why ami such a bitch~

i do not like my in-laws never have... never will


BUT I TRY,I PUT MYSELF OUT FOR THEM, ALMOST BEND OVER BACKWARDS, ALWAYS AM NICE TOO THEM!


and they have always just been awful they are cold n dont think they have hearts =(


DH & i have been together for 6 1/2 yrs now, any way we had DS b4 we were married YES HE WAS PLANNED... took 4 months to fall preg, any way they were cranky we were not married blah blah you know how it goes.


any way once DS was born MIL turned even nastier i had just given birth my legs were spread with the drs n a spot light up there stitching me up, oh n who's heads enter WTF the midwifes order them out... they then tyred again =( once they got in MIL just would not put DS down or give him to any one else. i could not BF medical reasons so they got DS a bottle he was gaging on it it was too fast, so they got a NIC baby teat still too fast, so he never feed till i took him home (same day im in n out in hrs) lol but they followed us home i was stuffed n wanted quite alone time with DH n DS so while i tried to feed him she was like ''your holding him too high'' ''now he's to low'' ''is he getting it'' ''hope no air is getting in'' SO I STOOD UP READY TO CRY & TOTALLY EXHAUSTED & HANDED DS TOO HER N SAID '' YOU DO IT'' & WALKED AWAY...


so i never feed my DS his first feed =( then she had goes at me about lots of things wont get into it all... (i ended up in tears)


then when ever they visited she would just change his outfits, re arrange his nursery ect would piss me off bad! even i said no leave it plz...


she has said on several occassions i love them till they crawl (so true as soon as DS could crawl n had a personality she wanted nothing to do with him....)


any way DS is now almost 4 n we have a new DS 4 1/2 months.


8 days after our 2nd DS was born my BIL had a baby (girl) first in 35yrs


but they day DS was born al MIL could say was oh how exciting BIL'S GF could b in labour WTF i just gave birth she had a brand new GS what a b@#ch it hurt me bad.


any way she rings BIL'S GF  every 2nd day to see how the kids are! his GF has a boy 2 weeks older then our first DS not to BIL (not that that matters) & not that i want her calling every second day but once a week or once every 2 would b nice i had 2 of her flesh n blood GK'S it hurts me bad............


they never have much to do with our kids & that hurts, when ever we see them she grabs little DS n ignores DS almost 4... but BIL'S GF'S DS 2 weeks older then ours they want him for the day n sleep overs they took our DS once over night he is 4yrs in November.................................................................................................


i know im a bitch but iv never been nasty or rude too them & i get so upset, my parents live 5hrs away so my boys dont see GRANDPARENTS MUCH =( DH'S  parents live 15min away... i know its there loss but my boys deserve better n iam so hurt... DH sees it but wont say anything he just says leave it alone leia, its there problem!


but our kids will get a complex n start too see it soon, plus DH'S oldest br has two kids who have beds @ there house n our DS gets in trouble for going in there  i mean come on....


they have a wedding pic of us in a lovely engraved frame not up... dont know where it is... gave them beautiful professional pics of DH n our boys in a beautiful frame not up no wher to be seen.............


my list could go on & on & on


DO YOU THINK I HAVE VAILD REASON TOO BE UPSET N NOT LIKE THEM?


sorry for the long vent feels better to get it off my chest...

Posted on August 25, 2010 at 4:38 pm
3monkeys
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(7) Comments

ChrisNScott
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ChrisNScott

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My sister's MIL is the same way.....then tries to put a guilt trip when her kids don't run up to them like they would normal GP's. 


Granted, my sister is a bitch. LOL


I don't think you're a bitch at all.  My only thought is maybe she thinks you don't like her so she stays away? 


I'm sorry, but she's the bitch here not you.

Posted on August 25, 2010 at 5:01 pm
3monkeys
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yes that was my tought too, i just feel for my babies =(

Posted on August 25, 2010 at 5:34 pm
Kaytana17
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You have a very very valid reason for not liking your in-laws


If I were in your shoes I'd be disappointed in the way your DH has stood up for you. DH and I have agreed that while we may not always agree w/situations - we'll always be a united front to everyone else. You and your DH need to be a united front.


Time spent with your two sons is precious. It's invaluable. If your in-laws can't respect you, and can not be respectful then they do NOT deserve quality time with your children.


Yes, your parents are 5 hours away - but I'm sure they are much much better grandparents. And in terms of time spent with your kids - quality is better than quantity..I'm sure your two sons will grow up to resent and dislike your in-laws and love your parents.

Posted on August 25, 2010 at 5:42 pm
NicolenMoe
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YES, i would have set them straigt along time ago , i give you props for controlling yourself. 


i think you need to address the problem an explain it from the point of view the children have. like you said the kids are at the age where they see that ther cousins have a room in grandma's house, an that they cant set foot in it an that hurts them , it set the tone that their cousins are more important. an when see that your spending more time with the cousins it truely breaks your sons hearts


 


i believe in addressing the problem, because it really does put a wedge between you which i know is her fault but i would try to fix it 


how belittling to have someone tell you your not raising your children right an then rearranging an redressing them that is demeaning a cruel 


im so sorry 

Posted on August 26, 2010 at 2:20 am
ChrisNScott
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This made me think of my BFF.  She just had her baby in Feb. MIL came down from NC to visit for like 3 weeks!!!


The day she arrived, she told her she wasn't feeding the baby enough, she wasn't getting enough breast milk (BFF was having hard time to begin with). Then, the next morning when she awoke....MIL had RE-ARRANGED the entire kitchen.  Chastized her for wasting coffee for not drinking the leftovers before making a new pot.....what?


The list goes on...I just thank my lucky stars I have a bearable MIL. I will keep you in my thoughts. :)

Posted on August 26, 2010 at 4:30 am
Southerngurl_40
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I too like NicolenMoe would have set her straight a long time ago.  I put my MIL in her place a long time ago and now she'll call me b4 calling her daughters.  But more importantly, u and dh need to address this issue.  Let him know how it makes you feel and give him the opportunity to address his mother about it.  As time permits and he doesn't, then you address it with her.  After addressing with her controlling, 2 yr temper tandrom azz see if there's a change.  If no change, then she wouldn't exist to me.  I would never attend or participate in any thing she's involved in.  If it continues, it's going to cause a strain on your marriage.  Keeping you in my thoughts.

Posted on August 26, 2010 at 7:15 am
3monkeys
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thanks girls, DH'Sdad my FIL works for my DH & its really hard to talk to either of them they dont listen, they are over the top controlling in our lives so much DH has stood up to that now thank god... they would tell us what we were doing on mothers day, fathers day, xmas n Easter & our birthdays if we didnt want to do what they planned they would give us the silent treatment, or if DH was on the phone to them they give a big guilt trip to make us feel bad then yell n hang up... (they should b in primary school)


but since DH stood up to them about that, WE MAY NOT EVEN EXIST IN THERE EYES! which is very upsetting to me... yes sure DH talks to his dad on a daily bases cause he works for him, lol but he never asks how the boys are n it hurts!


DS just had first ever pre school pics taken & i wont b giving them one at all (they dont even put our boys pics or DH N MY wedding pics up) so they can now go get f@#$ed in that way.... every one Else's pics are up all the other sons wedding pics are up bar the one that is not married... WTF like why?


my mother rings us daily n talks to both my DS on the ph, little DS is not a fan too young @ 4 months hehe but big DS loves my parents, they come & get him well they have twice once on our honeymoon for a week n once when bub was born for a week he loves it my parents visit 1 every 2-3 months for a week n stay with us... i just wish we lived closer =( DS already hates going to the inlaws he understands n he dont really like them lol,


we called in for 5min the other day DH  had to get a folder from his dad n ds said ''oh no nan you have little cuts all over your checks'' lol they were big red broken vessel's hahaha i wanted to lol, but i said ''seth dont say that mate'' she was so embarrassed i loved it secretly who would not!


IT HAS PUT STRAIN ON OUR RELATION SHIP & MARRAIGE BUT DH WONT HURT HIS PARENTS FEELINGS BY STANDING UP TO THEM =(


WHEN EVER I TRY TO TALK TO DH ABOUT IT HE SAYS ''I DONT KNOW GOOD POINT LETS GET ON THE PH N ASK'' but he is really mad when he sys it n says ''il say Leia wants to know why blah blah blah'' so i always stop him... i would love him to ask them calm n level headed.....

Posted on August 26, 2010 at 12:35 pm

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