Priorities

What are your priorities as a couple for the time you are going to be "just two"? What do you want to accomplish before you start having kids (or if you're going child-free, what other things are you planning to have in your life instead of kids?) I guess some examples would be "we want to travel the world" or "he wants to have his own law firm" or whatever.


I think for us our priorities are:


1)Get out of debt. DH has a good amount of credit card debt that we need to get paid off before we can make any other big financial decisions.


2)Find good jobs. We both have jobs that pay the bills but neither of us is doing something we are passionate about. DH is working on getting his EMT certification so he can become a firefighter, so he's closer to that goal than I am. I still don't know what I want to do with my life! I think we both want to have careers in fields we enjoy before we get too much older.


3)Get a dog! That means financially, being able to afford a dog + having something put aside for unexpected vet costs and pet expenses. It also means being able to either afford a rental that allows pets (aka more expensive) or having...


4)A house of our own. I do not want to have kids while living in apartments/rentals.


Only after we've got all those priorities taken care of do I want to have kids. At this point, that means we'll be about, oh... 50? ;D

Posted on February 9, 2011 at 1:53 am
LadyHope
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(17) Comments

carolinawedding
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ooh, good question. I think for us, priorities are that I want to be a little ahead at work and have my MBA, maybe even my PE. For him, he wants to finish this degree, get a job, and be well established in that.


And, of course, get out of our student debt!

Posted on February 10, 2011 at 10:24 am
GatorBride
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Great topic!


Our goals and silly dreams are a frequent topic of conversation, and one of us always says, "we could never do this if we had a baby." We have a ton, but the biggies are:


1) Pay off our debts (mostly educational & cars) and then eventually pay off our house (hoping to do that within 10 years).


2) Save a ton for our retirement. SS isn't going to be what it is now, once we hit that age... And "that age" will probably be 85 by the time we're 65! This way, we'll be able to retire on our own terms, when we're ready.


3) Go back to school for my Master's. DH can advance in his field (IT) without additional degrees, but he wants to focus on getting more certifications.


4) Travel, and possibly live on a boat one day :)

Posted on February 11, 2011 at 7:19 am
winterbride2011
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winterbride2011

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In no particular order...


1) Pay down our mortgage. 


2) We both have car loans right now (we both bought around the same time, but we weren't living together yet so it wasn't a joint decision).  Our *goal* when we have kids is to only have one car payment at a time.


3) Work on our house.  We want to develop our basement, some more landscaping, etc which costs way more than you'd think (or I'd think, I tend to be delusional about construction costs).  Basically, we want our house to be more of a home.


4)  Enjoy each other.  Its nice coming home from work and having our quiet dinners just the two of us.  Having more time to work on us, so we have a strong foundation when we have kids and life gets even crazier.


5)  Kids are a huge financial commitment.  Even when they're adults we'll be helping with post-secondary education, weddings, etc.  It never ends.  Its kind of nice to have some time to selfishly splurge on those expensive shoes, or that big screen TV without a second thought.


6)  Travel.  We've traveled the world without each other.  We want to do a couple big trips before having kids.  You can travel with kids, but I'm not going to take a 5 year old to Australia.  The Caribbean or Disneyland, but not a globe trotting trip.


7) Our fur baby (dog) is enough for now, and after the wedding I want to add a kitten to our family.  I'm content with our little family right now :)

Posted on February 11, 2011 at 8:49 am
inspiritedbeing
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I love this topic!


 


1) Have a strong marriage base


2) Travel to places we can't bring kids


3) Build our dream house


4) Save up a good nest egg (=

Posted on February 11, 2011 at 1:20 pm
em724
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1. Work on our house


2. DH - get a new job and finish MBA


3. Travel


4. Save more funny - which all of the above tend to put a dent in!

Posted on February 12, 2011 at 12:55 am
Mrs.P2be
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1) Graduate from both of our master's programs


2) Be financially close to having a house (or already have one)


3) Have taken a vacation somewhere together


 


We're pretty easy to please, and we've both always wanted to be young-ish parents. We are both turning 23 this year, so a couple more years and we will be ready!

Posted on February 20, 2011 at 1:21 pm
Ambrosia
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1) Have a steady career. He's set, but I'm not.


2) Travel. I'd really like to go to Europe.... and not tote around a bored, tantrum throwing child.


3) Get a dog! 


4) Become sane

Posted on March 7, 2011 at 2:43 pm
LadyHope
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Sanity is overrated. ;) And if you do have kids, they'll probably just drive you crazy again! :D

Posted on March 8, 2011 at 2:41 am
Ambrosia
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Oh nooo! After all my work! hehe

Posted on March 8, 2011 at 6:46 am
carolinawedding
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It's like amassing really nice stuff in your house, and then when you have kids you  have to put it all away so it doesn't get messed up or broken. And then you have to kiddie proof everything.


It's reason #29 on my list of why I don't want kids.

Posted on March 9, 2011 at 12:31 am
lsjhik
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I <3 this topic!


1. Pay off my car (we just bought a brand new car for DH so I'd like to only have 1 loan payment)


2. Pay off my STUPID student loans


3. Finish my degree


4. Buy a 2nd home (mountain cabin) for DH


 

Posted on March 14, 2011 at 2:29 pm
Lilivati
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When we talk about children at all, which is pretty rare, the only timeline issue that pops up is having a house.  That's our next big goal as a couple.  We are blessed to both (for the moment!) have solid, well-paying jobs, and a life we enjoy.


Getting things like trips abroad "out of the way" before having a child isn't something that really registers for us.  His parents frequently traveled (and ate out, and did other supposedly adult ventures) with their two boys, and not only was it not nearly as problematic as old wives tales would have it, it greatly enriched their children's lives.  I also think that being in the company of adults as a child and expected to adhere to a higher standard of behavior (if not exactly an adult one) is one of the things that made my husband such a tremendous man as an adult.

Posted on August 31, 2011 at 7:52 am
thisiscooling
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I love this thread, great thing to think about.


For us;


1) Get established in our careers and start to feel more stable money-wise


2) Travel more. I want to see a lot before we have kids not only because its easier to travel just the two of us, but because its a lot cheaper to take 2 people rather than 3 or 4 to places like Australia


3) Be able to afford to move to a bigger place


4) Enjoy being young and in the early stages of our relationship, still learning about each other and life

Posted on September 8, 2011 at 11:35 am
mahoganieyes
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mahoganieyes

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No particular order-


1) Building a better connection as husband and wife. Eventhough we dated for 9yrs before getting married. Things are different.


2) Financially fit. I will admit, that I need to balance my money better.


3) I need a new car!


4) Complete college. Been there long enough and should be teaching classes by now! lol


5) Buy our first home. I love to decorate but living in apartments will limit your creative juices.

Posted on December 24, 2011 at 5:35 am
NicolenMoe
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pay off most of the debt


save 15g


travel 

Posted on January 24, 2012 at 5:59 am
fromcoldtofire
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  1. Sell this condo and buy a larger, single-family home

  2. Take at least two non-kid vacations (Europe, Hawai'i)

  3. Enjoy our time together as a married couple

  4. Save more

  5. Finish my second Master's, or at least be close to completing it


I personally would be happy never having children, but DH wants one (just one, whew!) Initially we discussed trying around our second wedding anniversary, but when we realized that that would be next summer, we thought that maybe waiting a little longer would be a good idea ;)

Posted on March 26, 2012 at 3:44 am
jmbuss9
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Oh, this is awesome!


1. Save money to buy a house/build a house together.


2. Enjoy being young and married together.


3. Pay off all of our loans.

4. Travel to places we won't be able to go after we start having children.


 


<3

Posted on September 12, 2012 at 9:52 am

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