Those TV Couples

There is this commercial that I absolutely hate. I'm sure you may have seen it--


Wife comes down the stairs in her robe to overhear her husband on the phone--"Really? You'd do that for me? I'd like that."


Shrill harpy wife demands, "Who are you talking to?!?"


"Jake, from State Farm."


"Jake, from State Farm at three in the morning?!?!"


I hate hate hate that commercial. I hate wondering why the husband is trying to get insurance at 3 in the morning, I hate the wife's voice, I hate that her immediate assumption is that he's cheating... hate!


Obviously that's not the only less-than-stellar TV couple. There are the sitcoms with the dopey husband who is always lying to his wife, the wives with barely-veiled disdain for their husbands, the nagging, bitter, jealous people.... the list goes on.


I am so scared of becoming one of those couples!! I don't want to be a nagging wife, or to resent my husband. I don't want my husband to feel like he has to lie to me so he can go have a night out with the guys.


I know that those negative relationship habits don't happen overnight (for the most part.) A lot of little things can build up over time until one day, you've been married for 10 years and somewhere along the way those patterns developed. I feel like I'm always being hyper-vigilant to root out any seeds of bad relationship habits before they start.


Does anybody else worry about this kind of thing? It's just whenever I see one of those couples snarking at each other in the grocery store, I start to worry... I don't want that! I know it's kind of silly, but still... do you ever see couples (in real life or on TV) and think, "Oh hell no!"

Posted on September 26, 2011 at 8:27 am
LadyHope
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carolinawedding
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carolinawedding

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Eh, kind of. DH and I do find ourselves getting moody with one another from time to time. Actually, this past weekend was one of those times. But we try to either recognize it in ourselves or talk about it. I mean, we get defensive, but it happens.


Like Friday night, I fell asleep on the couch because I just wasn't feeling well. I wake up sometime around 10 to DH putting on a sweater and saying he's going to a friend's place. I didn't assume he was cheating, at least. I was just really bothered that he barely spoke to me at home and as soon as I'm asleep he's leaving. Then Saturday he was a snapping at me, until at one point he was correcting my driving (wtf?!) and we got into it.


Anyway, moral of the story is that it happens and by the end of the day we realized we needed some stress free time with just the two of us.


Marriages are work, and bad things can happen if you let it. :)


And thost TV couples might be funny, but otherwise just dumb. There's been a shift from the TV dad/head of the household and the doting wife to the dumbass father and nagging wife. But then again, it's television and done for entertainment. I wouldn't be entertained by a stable couple. Same way Charlie Sheen is just funnier than Ashton Kutcher.

Posted on September 27, 2011 at 1:31 am
msdl
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I think a lot of it is a caricature, too. The media/entertainment industry take the tiny or repetitive habits and turn them into entire personalities.


I am like you, Sarah -- I really do not want to ever fit into any of those stereotypes. I feel like I am hyper vigilant about any bad trends developing in our relationship. Actually, we both are...


But like Layla said, sometimes our efforts to avoid the "stereotypical behavior" just aren't enough :-( I feel myself sounding like that nagging wife. Or I am looking at him like he is a clueless husband. I hate it, but sometimes that is just what is happening! LOL


For me, it's definitely a balance between nipping bad trends in the bud and accepting that at times, DH and I may fit those stereotypes. As long as that's not how we would define each other overall, I think I'm okay with it :-) 

Posted on September 27, 2011 at 3:31 pm
SpringBride2011
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Okay, let me start by saying.... I really am not a nagger AT ALL, however, MY DH really provokes me to NAG at him over certain things... i.e. cleaning up his dishes from breakfast... I get annoyed coming home every evening to the kitchen being a mess when I left it clean, so then I have to reclean the kitchen before starting dinner. I am as nice as I can be when I ask him to please please please clean up after himself, but it's in one ear and out the other. I tell him if wants to stop hearing me nag, then all he has to do is start listening to what I'm asking him and then nicely comply with my one request. He doesn't do laundry, he doesn't clean, he doesn't cook and he doesn't run errands....I don't think I am being unreasonable to expect him to at least clean his own mess in the morning.


That being said, I really think a lot of being happily married comes down to carefully selecting your battles. They are not all worth fighting, but some of them need to be taken on. After selecting your battle, it's best to do so in the most civil way and not make it an all out war, but just a firm communication as to why it's important to you and what you'd like to come from it.


I agree though that the commerical for statefarm is ridiculous. I was thinking the same thing, who in the world orders car insurance at 3am! There are better ways of showing statefarm is there for you with 24 hour service!

Posted on October 4, 2011 at 4:29 am

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