Why do you live where you live?

I've been thinking about this a lot lately. DH moved to this town from his hometown (the little one 20 minutes down the road) after his parents moved out of state so he could be closer to his friends. I moved here after I lost my job in MY hometown (an hour away) in 2009, so I could be closer to DH.


Neither DH nor I have careers--just jobs that pay the bills. DH has grown apart from a lot of his friends, and even the ones he still is closer to he doesn't see too often. Both of our families live in/near my hometown. DH and I are both unhappy with our jobs and would like to find something else. We've debated moving back to my hometown, but the prospect of both of us finding new jobs and a new place to live and moving is a little daunting.


So, how did you wind up where you are? Did one of you grow up there? Is it where you went to college, or did you move there because of a job? Have you ever considered moving somewhere else?

Posted on October 6, 2011 at 2:45 am
LadyHope
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01/01/2011
LadyHope

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(12) Comments

msdl
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05/28/2011
msdl

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Neither one of us had a choice in the matter :-) We live in this small town because it is where my DH is stationed for the Air Force.


I had MAJOR anxiety about moving here. Even though I lived in two different cities for a few years after graduation, I ended up back in our hometown. I am extremely close to my family, and all of my friends live somewhere in Texas. And it was very hard to leave right after the wedding. I am a city girl, and have never had a desire to live in a small town.


To be honest, now that we are away, it is not so bad. I hate how lonely it is here now that my DH is deployed. So I will be going home for a few months for the holidays. But I have enjoyed being on our own, and I am not as excited to go home as I thought I would be. Living across the country by ourselves has felt like a little adventure. But I had the incredible luxury of being able to keep my job from my hometown, and now I work from home. If I hadn't had that, I think things would be so different...and sometimes it keeps me up at night in this uncertain economy. Mentally, I'm always trying to prepare myself for the possibility that I might have to find a job here someday.


We are starting to discuss what we will do when DH's enlistment is up (in three years). It's almost a given that we will move back to our hometown. But now that we have seen the benefits of being away from home, we may move a little further out from everyone. Maybe a suburb or a nearby town?

Posted on October 6, 2011 at 3:05 am
LadyHope
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msdl, it must be hard being away from family and your husband, too! Sometimes it can be good to move away for a little while--I know my DH became much more independent after his parents moved away, and after they came back he was able to set boundaries more easily (No, MIL, we will NOT be coming to visit twice a month. Or for every cousin's birthday. Or when you only give us 3 days notice of an "important family event.") Everyone appreciates each other a little more, too, once you've been separated. And you're right--you could keep a little distance and it would still be better than however many hours/days away you are right now. :)


How fortunate for you that you can work from home, too! The fact that both DH and I would need to find jobs at the same time is part of what makes me shy away from making a move... what if only one of us found one? Eek!

Posted on October 6, 2011 at 3:40 am
carolinawedding
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03/19/2011
carolinawedding

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We both grew up in the area. Background: Everything is close to Charleston. There's no real break between most towns, you just know the areas. I could drive from my house to the islands and never drive through an area that isn't developed. So the move wasn't a huge thing and "moving to another town" didn't feel like it.


Basically, I got a job working in the town we're in and when we were looking at houses it's where we ended up. I didn't want a long drive, and at the time DH knew he'd have a long drive no matter what. And it's close enough to our families that we can see them when we choose, but not so close that they'd just drop in on us.

Posted on October 6, 2011 at 3:52 am
msdl
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msdl

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(No, MIL, we will NOT be coming to visit twice a month. Or for every cousin's birthday. Or when you only give us 3 days notice of an "important family event.")


^ LOL! This is my mom. Ahem, hence the suburbs or a neighboring town in three years.


I hear you, that would make me so nervous, too! It's like, how do you both look for jobs if you know it is also dependent on the other person finding one? In a way, it almost helps that right now you have jobs instead of a career. If you are not tied to one particular field, it could open up a lot more options for you.


 


 

Posted on October 6, 2011 at 3:53 am
beccabride
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We first started looking up where we bought for DH's job since he was having to travel over 2 hours to and from work every day, but about a month after we moved in, he got laid off.  He used to live up here before he met me and most of his family is here as well. DH's mom is great, but his stepfather can be a bit much to take, so we try and limit our time around him.  We will be spending holidays with his family and if my family comes down, and once we are settled, we are wanting to have one holiday each year here in our new home.  


My family is in both upstate NY and Florida.  We don't really have a relationship with the family down in Florida, but I see my family in NY quite often and since we are closer to them now, we are hoping to start celebrating holidays with them. 

Posted on October 6, 2011 at 5:02 am
Lilivati
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We grew up (well, he grew up, and I went to high school though spent my childhood-proper elsewhere) not far from where we currently live.  He LOVES it here.  I think our hometown is overrated and snobby, but there are far worse places to live.  Both of our parents are nearby which is nice at times and annoying at others.  XD  His extended family also lives in the area, and he likes that.


So basically we live here because he cared more about where we live than I do. ;)

Posted on October 7, 2011 at 7:02 am
SanFran
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09/03/2011
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FI and I met and lived in the East Coast until he got his "dream" job out in CA.  What a nerd.


But I'm glad he did.  Because I love the Bay Area and can't really think of anywhere else I'd rather live and work.  It's been stressful trying to find a way to relocate myself there permanently, but looks like we're on our way. :)  The fam is super far away, which is too bad, but I like to think this gives them a cool spot for them to visit too.

Posted on October 7, 2011 at 7:31 am
senoritashannon
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11/13/2011

senoritashannon

Thought provoking thread...FI & I live about an hour from my home town & 1/2 hour from F-ILs..but we both seperately choose that for job reasons- we'd love to live here when we buy a house but really high taxes probably will make the impossible...

We are looking near F-ILs as a possible home but I am not sold on the idea...to far to commute!
Posted on October 30, 2011 at 1:14 am
senoritashannon
4
11/13/2011

senoritashannon

Thought provoking thread...FI & I live about an hour from my home town & 1/2 hour from F-ILs..but we both seperately choose that for job reasons- we'd love to live here when we buy a house but really high taxes probably will make the impossible...

We are looking near F-ILs as a possible home but I am not sold on the idea...to far to commute!
Posted on October 30, 2011 at 6:57 am
aylacherie
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04/08/2012
aylacherie

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Right now, we're actually living about 10 hours apart. Thankfully we only have 5 months left of that! I live an hour away from where I grew up, since I have a good job here. He's living up north, because that's the only place he could find a job. I'll be moving up there after the wedding.

Posted on November 8, 2011 at 4:12 pm
jackieg
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04/17/2009
jackieg

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Um...because we want to??!! We are in Orange County, about 10 minutes from the ocean...we lived in TX for a few years and didn't like it...still own our home there...but will not live there again!!
Posted on November 9, 2011 at 12:32 pm
Sammy_D
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09/10/2011
Sammy_D

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We live out in the middle of freakin no where due to work!! We ended up getting jobs 2 hours apart in opposite directions, so we bought a small acreage halfway in between. That means we each have about an hour drive to work every day, but it's all highway so it's not bad. The only downside is that we each work in the larger towns in the area, so we have to be sure to get all our shopping and such done before we get home, and because we drive so much during the week, neither of us care to go anywhere on the weekends :)

Posted on February 9, 2013 at 11:29 am

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