10 Habits of Happy Couples

This is such great advice! 


1. Go to bed at the same time
Remember the beginning of your relationship, when you couldn't wait to go to bed with each other to make love? Happy couples resist the temptation to go to bed at different times. They go to bed at the same time, even if one partner wakes up later to do things while their partner sleeps.


2. Cultivate common interests
After the passion settles down, it's common to realize that you have few interests in common. But don't minimize the importance of activities you can do together that you both enjoy. If common interests are not present, happy couples develop them. At the same time, be sure to cultivate interests of your own; this will make you more interesting to your mate and prevent you from appearing too dependent.


3. Walk hand in hand or side by side
Rather than one partner lagging or dragging behind the other, happy couples walk comfortably hand in hand or side by side. They know it's more important to be with their partner than to see the sights along the way.


4. Make trust and forgiveness your default mode
If and when they have a disagreement or argument, and if they can't resolve it, happy couples default to trusting and forgiving rather than distrusting and begrudging.


5. Focus more on what your partner does right than what he or she does wrong
If you look for things your partner does wrong, you can always find something. If you look for what he or she does right, you can always find something, too. It all depends on what you want to look for. Happy couples accentuate the positive.


6. Hug each other as soon as you see each other after work
Our skin has a memory of "good touch" (loved), "bad touch" (abused) and "no touch" (neglected). Couples who say hello with a hug keep their skin bathed in the "good touch," which can inoculate your spirit against anonymity in the world.


7. Say "I love you" and "Have a good day" every morning
This is a great way to buy some patience and tolerance as each partner sets out each day to battle traffic jams, long lines and other annoyances.


8. Say "Good night" every night, regardless of how you feel
This tells your partner that, regardless of how upset you are with him or her, you still want to be in the relationship. It says that what you and your partner have is bigger than any single upsetting incident.


9. Do a "weather" check during the day
Call your partner at home or at work to see how his or her day is going. This is a great way to adjust expectations so that you're more in sync when you connect after work. For instance, if your partner is having an awful day, it might be unreasonable to expect him or her to be enthusiastic about something good that happened to you.


10. Be proud to be seen with your partner
Happy couples are pleased to be seen together and are often in some kind of affectionate contact -- hand on hand or hand on shoulder or knee or back of neck. They are not showing off but rather just saying that they belong with each other.


Happy couples have different habits than unhappy couples. A habit is a discrete behavior that you do automatically and that takes little effort to maintain. It takes 21 days of daily repetition of a new a behavior to become a habit. So select one of the behaviors in the list above to do for 21 days and voila, it will become a habit...and make you happier as a couple. And if you fall off the wagon, don't despair, just apologize to your partner, ask their forgiveness and recommit yourself to getting back in the habit.


Posted on January 4, 2013 at 3:48 pm
beccabride
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(7) Comments

MrsCaleYoung
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Becca this is so true and great advice! 

Posted on January 10, 2013 at 7:30 am
swissgirl
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Love this!

Posted on January 15, 2013 at 7:13 pm
GermanBride2011
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Wow Becca so true. I love this!!!

Posted on January 16, 2013 at 12:47 am
msdl
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Love this great advice - all so, so true. Funny thing, DH is adamant about #1. It can be hard for me bc he has to go to bed so much earlier, and I'm a night owl. But even though I am not the most technologically savvy, I have learned that this must be why Kindles and iPads were invented! Lol I have gotten on board and I must admit it is a good feeling to know we are ending the day together :-)
Posted on January 16, 2013 at 3:15 am
beccabride
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I agree Deb - I used to work overnight while everyone else slept, because my phone didn't go cray and I got a lot more accomplished.  But, when we moved in with each other, we worked at this and now, we do go to bed at the same time, and it is awesome because we talk about our day, what we have upcoming for the following day/week and it is just our time to decompress.  : )

Posted on January 16, 2013 at 3:11 pm
Uhlease
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I must have missed this before! Jeez. I need to come to this group more often, it's a great group! Thanks for posting!!!

Posted on January 30, 2013 at 10:32 am
JamesEden
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Wow.... Great tips thanks for posting such a wonderful article. I alway appy these tips for my happy marriage life.


....wedding speeches....

Posted on June 27, 2013 at 2:23 am

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