what would you do?

I decided to obtain a wedding consultant certificate & do this professionally after doing many of my friends & relative's weddings, but since I'm also planning my own wedding, I promised my FI that I would not take any case for this year.

However, one bride I'm working with for her wedding in 2008 referred a bride to me who's wedding at the time was only 3 wks away. The bride was having trouble with her cater who originally promised to coordinate her wedding, & against my better judgments, I took the case.

I met the bride 2 wks before her wedding & during the meeting I informed her that I'll need the list of vendors, wedding personnel (people in the wedding party & people who are in charge of wedding items), & the wedding day time line.

Through out the entire 2 wks, I've e-mail her & called her numerous times, but she never replied. The wedding day was getting real close & I still couldn't get a hold of her, so I called the bride who referred her & asked if she knew what was going on with this bride. She told me that bride's been posting on one of the wedding website about the problems she was having with her venue ~ which I knew NOTHING about.

I had to check on the website just to find out what's going on with her wedding. I called her three times that day & when she finally answered, she said she was actually taking care of that at the moment, so she'll call me back later with the update. Well, she never did, so I called again that night & finally, she told me the story w/ the venue.

& though she still had the venue booked for her wedding, she had no permit for sound amplifier nor alcohol, & she had to be present at the venue the whole time since the contract was signed in her name, which means, she wouldn't be able to get ready at the hotel as she originally planned & she would have to get ready at the venue (the venue only had a in-door reception room with a men's & a women's restroom, so we had a tough time trying to figure out where the bride could get ready).

& I couldn?t get a hold of her again after that. Then she finally e-mail me the vendor & wedding personnel list 3 days before the wedding, & 2 days before the wedding, she gave me the time line. I organized all the info she gave me & called all the vendors the day before the wedding & also called the bride to confirm everything. What I didn?t know was that she did NOT list everyone on the vendor / personnel list.

On the wedding day, one of the roads to the wedding site was closed, so everyone was late. While we were setting up the reception site, the wait staff asked me where the table linens were, but one, I was told that the wait staff will take care of ALL the table settings, & two, the linen rental company was NEVER listed on the vendor list the bride provide me!!

I couldn?t leave the wedding site & I had to re-do the wedding rehearsal since only 4 out of the 11 people in the wedding party showed up on the night of the rehearsal (that?s including the bride & groom). So I decided to send one of the usher to get the linen, but the usher didn?t have a car & he was from out of town. With nobody else there, I had to ask the groom to pick up the linen, & then the groom told me the Best Man (who went to pick up flowers) took his keys & he couldn?t drive his car. So I handed him my car key & had him drive my car to pick up linens. I walked into the reception room & the bride was there waiting for me cuz apparently someone told her about the linens, but I informed her that was already being taken care of.

Since the usher weren?t at the rehearsal either, I had to go over the wedding schedule with the head usher so that he would know where to direct the guests before, during, & after the ceremony. By the time everyone arrived at the venue, the schedule was delayed & we had to start the ceremony right away. However, since the bride did not list the person who?s in charge of setting up the sound system, I had no one to go to & I had no idea who has the sound system for the ceremony music. We just went on with the ceremony without any music (the bride actually told me to do so).

To make a long story short, many things went wrong on that day & I felt that I did the best I can with all the information I was provided. I had no way to communicate with the bride since the bride hardly ever reply my e-mail or phone calls, so I had no idea what she or the groom wants for their wedding.

I stayed & helped them clean up in the end because we needed to be out by 8 pm. The bride gave me a hug before I left & told me that she would definitely refer other brides to me. & she doubled my payment!!

But to my surprise, this bride went on the wedding website & blamed everything that went wrong on her wedding day on ME!! Honestly, I don?t mind if she?s not satisfied with my service as long as she stick to the truth. However, she lied about all kinds of stuff & tried to make it seemed as if she told me everything that I needed to know & I simply didn?t do my job!!

The other bride was not happy, of course. Because she was the one I contacted when I couldn?t get a hold of this bride, so she knew the whole story. & she tried to defend me, but only had others turned on her too.

I didn?t want to do anything in the beginning because I am a soon-to-be-bride myself & I can totally understand how bad she must felt about her wedding. & as a professional, I didn?t want to bad mouth my client. This went on for two weeks & everyone?s telling me to contact the website & tell them my side of the story. I refused, thinking that somehow this will all come to an end soon. However, she just wouldn?t stop!!

Like I said, I have no problem with a bride not being happy with my service. She had the right to complain & the right to talk about it. But not when she?s lying about things. I couldn?t tell my side of the story because that website won?t allow the vendor to post any message. & after she posted a detailed review in her wedding bio, I finally had enough of her. I wrote an e-mail to the website & explained the whole situation.

The website e-mail the bride & the next day, she posted the entire e-mail on the website. So I had to contact the website again to have that removed. Honestly, I don?t think I did anything wrong.

Yes, there are things that I could have handled in a better way & I never deny that. I will take full responsibilities for that. However, the bride needs to at least be honest about everything. You hire a wedding coordinator to help you coordinate your wedding, but how can she / he coordinate your wedding if you do not provide her / him proper information? All I want is for the truth to be told.

Well, maybe you can tell me what you would do in a situation like this?
Posted on September 7, 2007 at 8:04 pm
franieliu
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11/11/2007
franieliu

franieliu

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(6) Comments

mariegalapon
1
10/06/2007
mariegalapon

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I agree with you...you did everything you could to contact this bride..it seems to me that this bride just did not have her priorities straight...not only that...she is a liar too!!!, you have every right to defend yourself, don't be shy about it since she is not telling the truth...but I do admire you for your professionalism...
good luck with this bridezilla
Posted on September 7, 2007 at 9:43 pm
franieliu
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11/11/2007
franieliu

franieliu

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franieliu

Thank you for the support, mariegalapon! & good luck with your wedding!! Best wishes!!~~ :)
Posted on September 8, 2007 at 9:14 am
Kristen
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08/22/2009
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OMG what is wrong with some people?! I can't believe she would say those horrible things about you! Can't she be considerate of the fact that you took on the wedding 3 weeks before the actual day? And that you tried to contact her numerous times? And that even though she hired you, she needs to take some responsibility as well?

It helps that at least the 2008 bride is on your side. She should triple your pay, haha (I hope she didn't flake out on the doubling part).

That also sucks that you can't respond to her reviews like that on the wedding website. For whatever reasons, people will lie and it causes a lot of damage to businesses. At least on here vendors can respond to false negative reviews. You are definitely a true professional and I commend you for that. I would be huddled up in ball crying in the corner of the room, hehe. Or at least something to that effect.
Posted on September 8, 2007 at 2:55 pm
She1
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07/12/2013
She1

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I just don't understand some people. Doesn't she realize that by posting false information about you, it's hurting your business? Honestly what she is doing is wrong on so many levels, I wouldn't care about her feelings, how dare she bad mouth you when she was the one at fault. That?s deformation of character. I know this may seem drastic, but technically you could sue her if you wanted... and have the other bride that referred you testify on your behalf. If she paid you with a check, bring that as evidence...it shows guilt that she paid you double (if she was so unhappy with your performance why would she pay you double).

I'm so sorry this happened to you, especially since your planning your own wedding.... Try not to stress out about it to much, focus on your wedding now. Maybe you can talk to a lawyer and see if you can go to court with her after your wedding.....if you want to take it that far...I would, and not just because of all the damage she caused to your business, but because people like that need to be taught a lesson. If she did this to you, whose to say she wont do it to someone else? It's not the money...it's the point.Good Luck hun, I hope everything works out.

(PS, I feel bad for her new hubby, he married a BITCH!!! lol)
Posted on September 9, 2007 at 1:13 am
AmyL
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09/06/2008
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She clearly has problems. She can't accept the fact that she ruined her own wedding. She must love the attention and enjoy it when people feel sorry for her. I guess for some sort of justification that her wedding didn't turn out the way she envisioned it.

How can she not know she needs to be at the venue all the time? She signed the contract herself. I bet it's the venue's fault too. I'm not surprised that she's blaming the other bride who referred her to you. It seems nothing is her fault. As if the other bride twisted her arm and forced her to hire you.

I wonder if thats how she is with her family and friends. Maybe that's why no one really cared enough to show up for her wedding rehearsal.

Oh and she paid you double-advance payment for all the drama she's sending your way.

I feel sorry because she's so pathetic and I totally agree with She1. I feel sorry for her husband.
Posted on September 9, 2007 at 4:00 am
franieliu
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11/11/2007
franieliu

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franieliu

The bride paid me cash. But with all the stuff going on, I thought maybe she just gave me the wrong amount, so I e-mail her & informed her that she had accidentally paid me doubled. & she wrote me back saying the double payment was intentional & she thanked me for my honesty. So, yes, I do have proof that she doubled my payment (on purpose), & not because I asked her to.

I do take on the responsibilities of my faults. There were things that I could have handled better way. Instead of trusting her to e-mail me the info, I should have just e-mail her a form for her to fill out (but then again, I may not have gotten that 2 days before her wedding anyways).

I never deny the fact that I've only done weddings for my friends & family, so doing other people's wedding is new for me. & regardless if I'm new at this or not, good communication between the bride & the wedding coordinator is crucial. The wedding coordinator is not your best friend & how can we know what you are thinking or what you want if you don't communicate with us?

I know she must be so sad that her wedding didn't turn out to be the way she planned & I totally feel for her. However, lying about what happened & making others look bad will not change anything & honestly, I doubt that it's making her feel better because if it does, she would have stopped talking about it by now, no?

Anyways, thank you all so much for your support! I just want to tell the true story. & if this is only effecting me, I wouldn't really have to do all these because the truth will always come out, & that's what I believe. However, this had also involved another really innocent bride who did nothing wrong on her part. & that was really wrong!!

I can only wish her the best now that her wedding's done & over with. I hope she'll realize that in the end, what makes a beautiful wedding is that moment when your love one look into your eyes & promised you to love & cherish you for the rest of his live, & that's what it is all about!!
Posted on September 9, 2007 at 8:16 am

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