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All in Perspective


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I read project wedding everyday, and love reading about everybody's weddings!  I often come across people ranting about their bridesmaids, mothers in law, how they can't have a certain something at their wedding because it costs too much.

I find myself getting caught up in it, thinking, I wish I had this, or I can't believe so-and-so.  But then I remember it's all crazy.  My fiance and I are skipping a lot of things- we are paying for our own wedding, and last year I was diagnosed with a brain tumor, which requires MRI's every three months (and those suckers are EXPENSIVE).  We're also looking at surgery pretty soon after the wedding, which is another huge expense.  Needless to say, the limited funds we have are NOT going to the wedding.  I'm not writing this for sympathy, but because this whole ordeal has reminded me what is important in life, and what's not.

Weddings are consuming, they take a lot of time, planning, thought, and money.  But, it's important to remember it's just a day, and the stress is not worth it.   Afterall, a good wedding does not necessarily make a good marriage.

I wish EVERYONE has the wedding of their dreams, and that they have wonderful, beautiful lives filled with supportive people- and to keep things in perspective.


I wish the BEST for you!! You are so right..


Thank you for posting this. It's a great reminder!   I hope you are feeling ok & wish you the best too!


Great post!! I'm sorry for what you have to go through!


Thanks for posting.  Here is another post from a while back that was also very nice that I find myself going back to and re-reading to keep me "grounded" as I plan my low-budget but high-love wedding.

From 2000 Dollar Wedding bride, Sara

Dearest Bride-to-Be:

The 12-18 months of wedding planning will pass in a matter of hours or days. When it’s all said and done, the photos will be the primary artifact remaining.

My wish for you—when you look back at those photos—is for you to think:

Look at how relaxed I was. Fully present in the moment. Basking in it. Soaking it in. I was not saturated in stress.

My shoes and dress were comfortable enough for dancing. My beauty radiated out of me; it was not applied to me.

I got to spend quality time with my friends and family. I was myself, not a show. In fact, I was my fullest expression of self.

I do not remember whether the invitations were letterpress or whether the flowers at the ceremony were the same ones at the reception.

The wedding favors or the fanciness of the food did not make memories. The sincerity did. The connection did. The time together did.

It did not matter whether every last detail conformed to the signature colors. Instead of saying, “What a beautiful bouquet,” the guests said, “What a beautiful love.”

This is my wish to you, dear brides, as you pore over wedding magazines and read daily blogs. Some of it matters. Most of it does not. Casting your net in the wrong direction will most surely mean you miss the things you most dearly want to catch.

May your wedding be just one sincere, authentic, happiest day in a long line of many.

This is my wish to you.

All my best,



you are absolutely right. thanks for posting this. i wish you the best of luck in your tests and getting your health back on track!


Oh honey, I hope everything goes well!  It is all perspective, 100%!  I am so lucky that my FI and I can have the wedding that we are having, and I should focus on that instead of worrying about all of the details!  *Hugs*


Thanks for posting. I wish you the best too!


You are so totally right.  My wedding was small and fun and exactly what we wanted (and very little stress).  Big or small wedding, it should be about the couple and their commitment to each other.

I wish you all the best and I hope you, too, get to have the wedding of your dreams. 


beautiful post tkeith... way to put all our rants and fussing and complaints in check! youre absolutely right... its "just one day" and at the end of it all, the ultimate goal will be reached. we are all marrying our bestfriend. i wish you all the best and again, thank you for this!


You're absolutely right.  I wish you all the best and pray for healing for you.


thank you for posting this  :)


Thanks for the great post!!  All the best to you ((hugs))


so true...good health to you


wow. This is an amazing post...definitely going to be saving this one. Thank for your words of wisdom and the reminder that so many of us needed to hear. I too get caught up in wedding planning, and drown myself in details to keep myself occupied until my FH is safely home from deployment. I need to just remember that the most important thing is that he makes it home, and that we are married.


I hope that your life brings you all you deserve. I can't imagine how difficult it would be to find out I had a brain tumor....and for your strength and courage, I respect the hell out of you!!! My prayers will be with you, but more so, my appreciation for you words and insight will be carried with me through the remainder of my planning!! Thank you so much!


Thanks for posting this.  What a great reminder.  I will remember this when I'm worrying about centerpieces and stressing about invitations.

Thank you for reminding us all. This was a great post. I wish you all the best!!

Thank you!! :)


Thank you :) God definitely answers prayers and knows what you need when you need it! I just wrote my post "no honeymoon" and was feeling really down about it. Thank you for making me see how silly I was being. 

Last Updated: March 15, 2010 at 5:30 pm
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