If you’ve been a bridesmaid before, you may already know that conflicts are likely to arise when different types of people come together. Now that you’re the bride, we have a few ways to help keep the peace, and make your wedding a great experience for everyone involved.
Set your Expectations
Be clear with your bridal party as to what you want from them and what their roles are. If you have an inexperienced Maid of Honor, let her know what you’d like her to do for your wedding, whether it’s planning your shower, bachelorette party, or just being there for you to bounce ideas off of.
In the case of the inexperienced MOH, let the experienced bridesmaids step up to the plate. It’s pretty common for bridesmaids to complain if they feel other people aren’t doing enough. Encourage explicit distribution of responsibilities so everyone is on the same page.
Do you know what you want or don’t want during your bridal shower and bachelorette party? Telling your girls will avoid them having to guess what you want and arguing over it. Each one of them might think she knows you the best, so save them the trouble and set the record straight.
Having a destination bachelorette? Create a list of your top locations so they don’t end up spending hundreds of dollars taking you to a cold and rainy city! Don’t like those typical toilet paper dress and word search shower games? Let them know! Even if you’re afraid of being too demanding or becoming a Bridezilla, communicating general preferences will at least help your bridal party get started on planning what’s right for you.
Sometimes brides get lucky and have bridesmaids that all know each other and already click. However, that is oftentimes not the case! Lunch gatherings, weekend pottery painting, or relaxing mani/pedis are great ways to give your girls a chance to get to know each other and talk. There’s only so much they can do through email, so giving them a venue where they can interact with each other in person will help them unite as your bridal party.
However, if it becomes apparent that your bridesmaids don’t have much in common or don’t get along well, don’t force them to hang out with one another. This just sets the stage for something bad to happen.
Drama may be inevitable when certain personalities collide, so don’t freak out if you have to get involved. Because weddings are stressful, arguments are pretty common and sometimes you might need to step in and mediate. Handle these situations calmly and with care, and remember that if you’ve chosen correctly, your bridesmaids all love you and want the best for you.