You will no longer have access to your Project Wedding account on or after March 30, 2017. Save any photos or information you'd like to keep and join WeddingWire for your all of your wedding planning needs today. Learn more »

Advice: Guest list


We stressed so much over our guest list and I've read 3 worried posts about guest lists just today so I have to make an official post about our guest list philosophy:

Ask yourself which people you would be absolutely devastated to miss at your wedding. We're talking heart-broken, not an "aw...that's too bad..." but devastated, if they RSVPd "not able to attend." Write down their names. These are the most important people in the world to you and they should be at your wedding. You absolutely do not owe an invitation to anybody else, no matter their relationship or past relationship with you.

So I ask:

WHY why why why WHY stress over whether to invite people you would barely miss? It boggles my mind? DO NOT EVEN BOTHER INVITING THEM because it is not worth stressing over whether the 120 people you've invited will fit into your 80 PAX venue. Or, even worse, how REDICULOUS is it to hope upon hope that someone you've invited won't come? Why are you inviting someone you don't want there? (unless they are immediate family...which is just a whole nother post. lol)


Stop stressing. It's easier than you're making it out to be. How much more would you enjoy packing another couple $Thousand onto your honey-fund rather than just inviting everybody you've ever known, that girl you were bffs with in high school but haven't seen in two years or your first grade teacher you haven't seen since the first grade. 

And hey, I'm not looking to offend anyone. If you have a large guest list, that is absolutely your prerogative and I'm sure your day is going to be beautiful.It's awesome that you have the budget and the room to invite absolutely anybody you wanted to!! I just have to post this in case someone who *hasn't* sent out invites yet could use the reality check. I wish someone had said these things to me a year ago so I would have stopped obsessing over people-pleasing! Your wedding day is about a marriage of two souls and a joining of families, not about whether your co-worker's, second cousin's or college roomie's feelings will be hurt if you don't extend the invitation. This is the ultimate "my day my way" rite of passage. Just say no.

Last Updated: September 29, 2009 at 11:36 pm
Log in or Sign up to post a comment
1375009361 small thumb 64928b365cce924b62db04d334de7174
1375010123 small thumb 3469d41691b7029fe8f3d9115e5eff55
1375009687 small thumb 092d0aa843b07fec395fc883886ec8eb
1375010217 small thumb f97a6a032675e6901dfe33ce44d2a038
1375010146 small thumb 226c42c862ccb24800a21bdcb3c6d526
1375009351 small thumb e7054787d3bd4f49ed95b94eeb6239f6

Find Your Wedding Vendors

Featured Vendors Near You

Chat About It