My hubby is deploying at the end of march and it is really starting to get the best of me, Every night before bed I get a stomach ache at the thought of him being gone. I know I need to be strong for him but it so hard. Anyone been in my shoes? Any Advice on marriage and deployment? Its so hard to explain my feelings with family and friends because I feel as if they dont truly understand.

Awww sweetie, it'll be ok! :)

My husband has been deployed twice, so I definitely know what you're going through! It is tough, but at the same time I felt like the time leading UP to him leaving was the toughest. You're preparing for stuff, you know there's going to be this kind of hole in your lifestyle and you have to figure out how to deal with it, and it's a lot.

I found that him being gone was actually not as bad as I thought it was going to be once we were IN it. We emailed, skyped, wrote letters, sent packages, etc. It goes by really quickly and there's always those times when you're feeling down or missing him or it hits you harder than usual, but I kept busy. My friends all kind of banded together to make sure we did something at least every couple of weeks to get my mind off of him being gone and occupy my time and just be there for me. They couldn't really *get* what I was going through, but they tried as best they could to be my support system. Also, I had a few military wife friends whose husbands were in the same unit, so we could talk about it and hang out with each other too.

I definitely think the first deployment is the hardest to get ready for, but this is what your husband does and as much as it hurts that he'll be gone, you have to be strong! How is he handling it?? I know some guys are pretty shut off about it and others are emotional...I would just take it day by day and see how it goes.

What branch of service is he in and how long is he gone for??

If you ever need to *talk*, I'm here for ya! I just moved to California because my husband got stationed here and I don't know many people so I'm around ;) Good luck with everything!

my FI and I just moved to California too @jenndover :) My FI was stationed at Pearl Harbor when I met him and moved there. 2 months after I got there he was deployed for a few months and I know how hard it can be. Saying goodbye wasn't the hardest part for me, it was the drive home alone and the realization he wasn't going to be back for a long time that got to me. But after a while it's something you learn to deal with. You have to be strong and know that you'll be back together soon enough. Send a lot of letter and care packages, email tons and keep your head up.

I'm engaged to an army guy...we've been together for over three years now, a deployment, ranger school included in that time. I think both "jenndover" &"futurenavywife" would agree with me that something innate kicks in when the guys leave. You have no option but to keep going. It is a lot easier for them if we are back home with our heads high & smiling...stressing out doesn't do them or us any good...& when you do need to scream or cry or let loose with your emotions, that's what we are here for:-) lean on us other military wives/fiancees/girlfriends when you aren't aren't having a good day! ((hugs)) you are stronger than you think!!! lots of love!! Remember..we are here for you!

tysbride09 I think everyone here said it best... You are going to find out that you are a very strong woman... The hardest time for me during this deployment were when he first left and when he had to go back after R&R... Find a strong group of people to lean on while he is gone, cry when you need to cry. Write tons of letters! Even if you don't mail them to him just write down what you did that day or what is going on in your life in a way its like having a mental conversation with him. If you need to chat we are all here for you! Big hugs!!