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16 8 3
12/02/2011 at 12:36 pm

What is everyones opinion on adoption? DH and I have talked about it a little bit but not much since we haven't done the IVF yet. I don't know my feelings and I have definate reservations about it and that makes me feel selfish sometimes. What do you guys think?

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23K 337 7
12/02/2011 at 12:55 pm

We are 100% for it if that's what it takes for us to have a child! And I'm adopted myself.

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16 8 3
12/03/2011 at 06:22 pm

I am so aprehensive. It makes me feel like a bad person sometimes that I honestly don't know if I could love a child as much know it was not biologically mine. I think also that it may be that I am sometimes angry I can't easily have a baby like all the people I know who got "accidentally" pregnant. Not that I am not happy for them it is just like a slap in the face.

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23K 337 7
12/04/2011 at 02:20 pm

Sounds like adoption is not for you

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1797 77 6
12/04/2011 at 02:59 pm

I would love to adopt...even if I am able to have a biological child.  But unfortunately, DH is not :o(

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1648 166 7
12/05/2011 at 08:56 am

 DH and I did 3 IUI's to get pregnant but have always thought we would adopt whether we conceived or not.
I think having doubts and questioning things is very normal. You both have to be on the same page about bringing a child into your relationship (however that happens) but being "ready" for something does not mean 100% certainty. We tried for 17 cycles and now that I am happily pregnant and anxiously awaiting her arrival I still have moments of doubt. Will I be a good parent, will I screw her up somehow, can we afford to raise her the way we "pictured" it, will I love her right away?
I am already worrying about baby#2(if we are lucky enough) and #1 isn't even here yet! Will I have enough love in me for two babies, etc...Some may think those are silly things to worry about but nonetheless they occasionally pop into my head.
It is not selfish to want a biological child and being so thoughtful and honest about your feelings on adoption is the opposite of selfish. It is a lot of work to go through the adoption process so I think just researching what goes into it (if you persue that) will help to give you and DH some clarity on the subject. ANd you may find that right now it is not for you but 5 years from now it may be the perfect way to bring a baby into your household. :)

good luck!

12/06/2011 at 09:57 am

I'm all for adoption.  Every child deserves to have loving parents- whether that's by birth or adoption.  My hubby is actually adopting my daughter.  And DH and I would love to adopt someday.  We are trying for one more after this one, and then we've talked about adopting a child from another country.  My oldest plays soccer with a little girl from Ethiopia.  Her parents have 3 children of their own and then adopted this little girl and her brother from over seas.  They are the most wonderful family, and the kids are so beautiful and so happy now.  I would love to be able to be a mommy to a child who was born into a bad situation.  In essence, DH is giving that to my daughter and I'd love for us to give that to another child.  :)

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