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Hate thinking this way...

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01/24/2013 at 12:14 pm

I feel like this week the thoughts of having a M/C has consumed my every thought. I HATE that I cannot stop thinking this way. As dumb as it sounds I feel like I need to have morning sickness to 'feel' pregnant... since I havent had my u/s yet (a little over a  week away) & obviously wont feel the baby move for a while, it just doesnt seem real to me. I did feel pretty awful on Sunday & Monday, but now I feel fine. Just tired & sore boobs. Now I am thinking Sunday & Monday queasiness was all in my head...

How do I stop thinking this way? I have been loosing sleap over it even. Did anyone else feel this way?

01/24/2013 at 12:57 pm

Oh I felt the exact same way when I was early on. This is my first pregnancy so I was just constantly worrying that something would happen cause it was still early. I also didn't have very many symptoms at first. I know it's hard to not think like that, but as time goes by, you'll start to relax more :)

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01/24/2013 at 01:13 pm

Oh hunny, I'm 26wks tomorrow and I still have moments where I'm worried something is going to happen.  I had a m/c the first time too and I was a complete freaking spaz until we hit our 2nd trimester and I'm still not that calmed down about it.  I ask the midwife everytime I see them "You're sure everything is perfectly fine" haha.  The way I see it, first time preggo women are super concerned but if you have an experience like ours you're like triple that and I think everyone gets we're extra worried.  Just try to not let it consume you.  You have nothing to worry about until something happens until then, roll with it.  It's hard to do I know but excess worry won't help either.

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2237 152 12
01/24/2013 at 04:00 pm

Oh Mar...I was totally there 2 weeks ago and still some days...But I try to tell myself that if there's something wrong to happen with this pregnancy, there's nothing I can do about it and I'll be devastated at that time, no matter how much I anticipated it. So while everything seems to be okay, I decided to simply enjoy every moment of it and be happy. So far, this way of thinking worked well for me!

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01/24/2013 at 04:38 pm

Thanks ladies! I am trying so hard to enjoy everything, but I cant help the feeling of being totally out of control (which I hate that feeling) and not KNOWING. Ugh... I cannot wait until I see a little beating heart, so the majority of my anxiety over it will go away.

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01/24/2013 at 05:27 pm

It does get better in the 2nd trimester, but not all worries are magically erased.  One worry is just replaced by a new one.  My best advice, it to give it to God, and you know that you can only do so much.  I wish I would have let go a lot more and spent less time focusing on something that is unknown in my first trimester!  Would have saved me a lot of pain!

If you worry and something bad happens, then you have felt stress.

If you worry and nothing happens, then you have felt stress.

I read this book once that said when you worry and stress over someting (especially play out a scenario in your head), your brain releases the same chemeicals that it does when that thing actually happens.  

Take care of yourself, a use this time to strengthen your relationship with DH and enjoy it.  It goes by really fast :)  I can't say I wasn't there with you---because there were days when I totally was!!--but you have been given today, and you are pregnant.  So love it!

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01/25/2013 at 10:21 am

@kblove - you gave me chills with your response. Thank you.

01/25/2013 at 07:15 pm

I am so glad I saw this thread after kblove's response!!  I too have felt stress given the time it took to conceive and having previous m/c.  But that post makes so much sense to me and will be my new mantra :)  Thanks!

01/25/2013 at 10:20 pm

I was talking about this with my girlfriend today- just like the other girls said- it doesn't go away- thats what happens when you become a mom- the worry starts from day 1! But she told me that you have to stop worrying about the things you can't control. As long as you are doing what you are suppose to take care of your body then thats all you can do. I know its hard esp when you don't feel preg- I still have those days where I forget and im almost 26w! So just relax bc thats whats important. GL!

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