Welcome ladies….

I know that when I was planning my second marriage I was concerned about what some people might think. My first wedding was small and fast and I really wanted to go all out this time (and I did) but was worried that people might think it was wrong and that we should elope and not bring as much attention to it. I say FORGET THEM!!! This may not have been my first marriage but it was my FIRST marriage to DH and we were doing it right.

I have absolutely no regrets about how we did it and anyone that pre judged the situation quickly changed there minds.

It is YOUR day and has to be done the way YOU want.

My first marriage was a nightmare!! I was too young and stupid.

I was 21, he was 28. I wanted to have fun and go travelling - he said he did too - but as soon as the gold band was on my finger he started talking about kids and I was getting loads of pressure from the in-laws to give them a grandchild. Ex even tried hiding my BC!!
I knew I'd made a mistake and unfortunately ended up walking out on him on Valentines Day, only 7 months after we'd married.

All things happen for a reason, I am now marrying my best friend (literally, we were inseparable for over 2 years before we got together), we have our amazing twin boys and we are waiting for our new house to be built (starting tomorrow!) back 'home'.

I know what is important in our marriage, and it's not how much we spend on our wedding day or where we have our HM, it's about our future together. I can't wait !!

I’m so happy for you that you found your true love. At least you figured out what you wanted and didn’t waste any more time before giving yourself the chance and opportunity to meet and be with someone that you really love. I see so many marriages that should never have continued and there is so much anger, bitterness and resentment. People that stay together for kids, out of guilt…. Its sad and not the way anyone should have to live. Life is way to short.

Here is my story:

I met my ex when I was 21 years old. I got pregnant with my first son quite quickly and told him that I didn’t want to get married because of a baby and wouldn’t accept a hospital bedside proposal. I had a very difficult pregnancy and went into a major depression (not because of the baby…it was a hormonal thing and I lost 48lbs went pregnant as I threw up about 15 times a day and was in the hospital on an IV getting rehydrated every week for the ENTIRE 9 months) and he stuck by me through it all. When I saw him with our son and thought about how sweet and nice he was I agreed to marry him. When we were planning the wedding I found out I was pregnant again (on our 1^st Childs 1^st birthday) at the end of October so we did a quick wedding the following February when I was a few months pregnant.

It didn’t take long for both of us to realise that our relationship was al about the kids and our great friendship. There was no passion and no “real” love….

 If I hadn’t gotten pregnant originally our relationship would have probably quickly fizzled and we would have remained best friends. I knew that I should have trusted my gut feelings and not gotten married but I was afraid. Afraid of being alone, afraid of losing as great guy, afraid for the kids…. We decide to end things before we resented and hated each other. Our ultimate goal and priority was (and still is) our kids.

He is now with a great woman who has 4 kids of her own and I am married to my true soul mate.

I know how lucky I am to have found a way to make our relationship work and how lucky my kids are to have such a great dad, a terrific step mom and AMAIZNG step dad.

That's so nice that you have remained friendly. I am lucky enough to have 3 amazing parents, and a step-monster that I tolerate for my Dad's sake - but they all make a real effort with each other so my siblings and I have a great support network and we can still enjoy family get togethers without worrying about any drama!!

Look at all the love!! I keep telling my friend "you have to survive the frogs to find your prince"!!

Well done my fellow survivors xxx

canooknic - that is soooo true I sruvived my frog as did FI i'm so glad to be over that hurdle & am looking forward to each & every new step with my FI

Thanks for starting this group ladies!

My first WEDDING was amazing and it's going to be hard to top it so we're doing something completely different. It's my FI's first marriage so it has to be a "normal sized, traditional" wedding for him and his family.

My first MARRIAGE was a joke. Actually lasted less than 3 months even though we were together for over 4 years before that. I'm so happy that it didn't work out because FI is an amazing man and better than anyone I thought I would end up with.

People keep making jokes about how long this one is going to last or asking me if I'm really sure that I want to get married again... screw them! I'm so happy and excited!!!!

Yeah, I got the jokes too. I accepted the comments about being heartless and leaving him on valentines day ( because checking the calendar was obviously top priority that day?!?) but anything to do with how long I tolerated the hideous marriage really gets to me - it's a miracle I lasted as long as I did!!

Like you say, I'm happy and excited so screw them!!