I know this is something that a lot of couples do before getting married. FI and I are also interested to go through this, not because we have current issues, but because I think it could be beneficial to sit down with a professional and discuss our relationship and see if they could offer some additional insight for a lasting marriage.

So here comes the 'choosing' process and I feel pretty clueless on what to look for. I checked the website of a church that FI & I have attended together before, it says "couples living together are not knowingly admitted into our premarial classes" Ok I completely understand that & I won't lie about our living arrangements to get in to a class. So next comes the yellow pages :) I wrote down several names and phone numbers that I plan to call tomorrow. Is there anything specific, other than 'what kind of program do you have for pre marriage counseling?, how long is program? fee?'

Has anyone else been through this process already? & how did it work out for you?

FI and I went through our church and through an independent agency. We both are so glad we did since both counseling experiences gave us a much more realistic view about marriage. The first session we attended was a 6 hour workshop on a Saturday. It was offered through a local counseling agency here in Atlanta. If you'd like a more (non-religious), objective counseling experience that will still give you the same beneficial information as one you would go through in a church...then try looking up some local counseling agencies in your area that offer pre-marital.

Our second experience was through our church and it was a 1 1/2 hour session every Monday for 6 weeks.

DO IT!! you will be so glad that you did :-) We learned SO much about better communication, managing and resolving conflict, decision making and just overall realistic views and expectations that we both had about marriage.

 Also, make sure whatever counseling session you all decide on will provide you with a certificate stating that you completed the course... you can use that counseling certificate to possibly get a discount on your marriage license ;-)

The pre-marital counseling session through our church was free, the session through the independent agency was $150 if I remember correctly. Hope this info helps!

Thanks for the info! What you said about counseling giving a more realistic view on marriage is exactly why I am interested for us. & I had no idea there could possibly be a discount on the marriage license with the certificate, thanks for the info :)

Ditto soon2beMrs.J on all the benefits of pre-marital counseling. DH and I shopped around for a program, and while we did one through a church, neither of us belonged to the church or are even religious. The adapted the program to take most of the religious stuff out for us, though the basic concepts stayed the same. Ours was a 6-week program, an hour and a half every Saturday (rescheduled to fit our schedules as needed). I forget the cost.

You may also want to look into counselors and clergy who have been trained in the Prepare/Enrich program.  It's a premarital questionnaire/evaluation and in addition to the value of the program itself, you also will know that anyone who's gone through the training to learn to administer it actually wants to (and probably regularly does) work with couples who are planning to get married.  Click here to look up professionals in your area. 

Also, you can look into professional counselors to find someone who specializes in working with couples and/or does premarital counseling.  Check websites like PsychologyToday and TherapistFinder. 

HTH and good for you for investing in your relationship!!

We did www.eeweekend.org

It's through the Catholic Church, but the weekend is non-denominational.  People were there of all faiths, or no faith.

DO IT!!!  Even if it's not through that weekend, just do it.

DH & I lived together 4 years before we married and we still got so much out of it.

I'm definitely doing classes for sure :o)

We did ours through our church.  DH isn't particularly religious, but religion wasn't a focus for the sessions.  Religion was talked about, but the focus was on US, our differences and similarities, understanding how we as individuals react differently to situations that arise because of our personalities and how to understand those differences and build an even stronger relationship through good communication.

Both of us enjoyed the sessions and were so glad we'd done them, even if it was technically after we were legally married!  :)  Oh and I should add that we were lucky.  My pastor knew that obviously we were living together (hello MARRIED!) and had been since before we'd gotten married and never said a bad word about it!

hmm i wish i was more help we didnt do it, i dont really regret not doing it , but i can also see the benefits of doing it ,

wishing you luck in your search