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Sort of TTC Related: Am I Being too Sensitive?

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11/21/2012 at 08:34 am

So, a few weeks ago my friend and I were texting and I got a little offended by something she said.  I told her that I was offended and she said that it wasn't meant that way and that I shouldn't take every little thing to mean the most negative (I don't)   Then goes to say that if this is going to be the case all we will be able to talk about is the weather.  OMG...I was getting livid at this point.  But, I just said 'ok...I guess I just misunderstood.'  Then she says 'well, I'll just chalk this up to you being over sensitive and hormonal'!  Really?!  She knows what we've been going through and I just can't even imagine saying to someone that is having trouble TTC that you're being too sensitive and hormonal. 

If I offended someone I would just say 'I'm sorry it came across that way...I didn't mean to hurt your feelings' and that would be it.  I would never blame the person or pretty much say they don't have a right to feel a certain way.  UGH!    Now she's having a Christmas party and I don't want to go...she emailed me today to see if I got the invite. 

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11/21/2012 at 08:47 am

I think you're right to be upset.  I would have been too.  As you stated, she should have apologized for offending you and explained that she didn't mean it that way.  Sometimes we say something and don't realize that we've hurt the other person or that it may have come across differently than we intended.  Regardless of the intent, if the end result was that someone we care about felt hurt/offended, we should acknowledge that and apologize. Instead she FURTHER offended you by telling you not to take everything so negative and that you're being too sensitive and hormonal.  She's being totally rude and insensitive in my opinion! 

Tell her you're not feeling well - too hormonal - so you can't make her Christmas party! ha! 

11/21/2012 at 09:55 am

No, you are not being too sensitive! I don't understand why (as your friend) her immediate reaction to the first time you stated that you were offended was not, "I'm so sorry, that is now what I intended." It's so simple to say those words (?) You were even more generous and gave her another way out by saying that perhaps you misunderstood. She really should have left it alone at that point.  

Sorry if this gets you fired up again! I just don't understand why people can't stop and THINK sometimes. And show some compassion/maturity v. sarcasm or being "right". That is no way to treat anyone, let alone a friend.

I love prbetsi's response to the party invite! :-D

{HUGS}

11/21/2012 at 09:57 am

Ditto prbetsi75 -- You have a right to be upset!! She KNOWS what you're going through.... and that snotty remark certainly doesn't help! I wouldn't go to the christmas party either :( I would be upset too!!

11/21/2012 at 10:17 am

lol @ prbetsi...my DH said I should say the same thing...too hormonal for the xmas party!

Right around the same time I was pinning '5 year vow renewal ideas' and she texted me:

5 year vow renewal???  Seriously?? 

Yeah, that made me mad too...then last week when I posted on fb about secret boards she commented...'Hmmm what will we talk about now'

I think I'm just over it.  It's kind of sad because I just feel like I don't have any true girlfriends that I can really trust or confide in (so glad I have you ladies). 

 

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11/21/2012 at 11:51 am

You are NOT being too sensitive! AT ALL!

As a pretty sarcastic person myself, I know when and when NOT to be sarcastic & throw silly jabs. She doesn’t seem to have that discernment at all.  I would use verbatim what prbetsi75 said "Tell her you're not feeling well - too hormonal - so you can't make her Christmas party!".

Give her a little taste of what she does to her 'friends'! Ew!

11/21/2012 at 03:08 pm

My EXACT thought to the Christmas party invite was to respond as the other girls have said - Sorry, can't make it.  I'll probably be too hormonal.  What a jerk!  And the vow renewal thing?? Why is she being so catty?  I have little patience for this kind of High School nonsense.  I'd just tell her to do us both a favor and lose my number.  I have enough to worry about without some toxic "friend" stressing me out.  I have no problem telling people to hit the road.  In light of all of that, YOU are definitely NOT overreacting :)

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