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Do you Hate your Engagement Ring?

You love the fact that he proposed, but the ring is a little, er, not your style. What do you do? (expert advice)

Do you Hate your Engagement Ring? article photo
Jose Villa

He's excited and nervous at the same time…fumbling for the prize that serves as a symbol of his devotion to you, but after the awkward pauses and heartfelt speech – the dust settles and you realize…I don't quite care for my engagement ring. Don’t worry, you are not alone and while you don’t want to seem ungrateful or hurt your better half's feelings, it's best to share your true thoughts. This is a ring that you will wear every day, so it should fit your finger, as well as accommodate your lifestyle.

Time is Ticking…

If you absolutely hate your engagement ring, keep in mind that some jewelers carry strict policies regarding how long one can return or exchange an engagement ring – usually between two weeks and 30 days. This means that you shouldn’t waste any time fretting over how you're going to break the news. Below you will find a few suggestions on how to handle some of the most common engagement ring woes a bride-to-be may encounter:

Common Complaints for Engagement Rings

"He Didn't Listen to Me!"

If your fiancé is proposing to spend the rest of his life with you, then he should at least know some of your basic likes and dislikes. Therefore, if you can't stand the sight of yellow gold, and he presents a gold engagement ring anyway – you may have a few issues to iron out. When the time presents itself, gently communicate to your partner that the kind of ring he's chosen will clash with the rest of your jewelry choices, and doesn’t match with your personal preferences. Suggest that the two of you shop for something that accommodates your sense of style. 

"It's Too Flashy"

An engagement ring is a major purchase, so it doesn’t make any sense to waste money on something you haven’t exactly fallen in love with. Tell your fiancé that you appreciate the gesture, but you'd rather return to the store to choose an engagement ring that best suits your style.

"It's a Family Heirloom"

Perhaps the ring has been in the family for many years or once belonged to his mother. The very tricky situation of receiving a previously owned engagement ring is pretty hard to ignore. Many brides wish to slip onto their finger an engagement ring especially chosen just for them, which is exactly what you should tell your fiancé if the issue should arise. Express that you are honored to have received a family heirloom, but that you would prefer to wear a ring dedicated solely to your own union.

 

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1157 34 9
11/14/2011 at 01:33 pm

I don't hate my ring, it's just not what I would have chosen.  My DF purchased mine online before we even talked about getting married.  My first engagement ring was a diamond chip and all rings were of the small/delicate nature.  As I got older, I started purchasing for myself thicker/sturdier jewelry with larger stones.  I wanted a Hearts on Fire ring, instead I got a no-name 3 stone.  I won't give it up because it's what he gave me.  Maybe for our 5 or 10 year anniversary I might be able to finally get that HOF.

10/12/2011 at 05:30 am

I love my ring too! FI picked mine out all by himself, I had no say in it...aside that I definitely wanted a diamond :)

@Meemz...I'm sorry about your situation.  Maybe you should just let him know that its not what the ring means that you have an issue with, but maybe just tweak it a  little?  Maybe you could ask him for his input on how he thinks to improve it, or go with him to try and change it?  I hope this helps!

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344 54 6
09/06/2011 at 02:50 pm

I love my ring! My fiance got it so right! He picked everything out himself including the setting. But I also love how he figured out my ring size. I dont own any rings so one night when I was sleeping he made a ring out of paper and fitted it to my finger. If it was to big he would make another one. When they asked my ring size he gave them the paper ring and said that was my size. The ring fits perfectly.

 

I love my ring photo 3126091-1

 

 

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2 2 1
09/06/2011 at 10:20 am

That's what i thought Sunny but I guess it was the wrong place, wrong time? It's pretty devastating to think that I could lose him over this. This must have hit him really hard.

 

And the only thing i said was the shape, that's it. I think it's  combination of a bruised ego and a very stressful situation already in Afghanistan. Wrong place, wrong time.  How can i not be looked at as materialistic at this point? I have no ideas.....

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Last Revision on Jan 24, 2010 at 11:24pm
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