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How to Deal with His Bachelor Party

Does his big night out have you extremely nervous? Calm down -- and read on for our key advice! (expert advice)

How to Deal with His Bachelor Party article photo
Leigh Miller

Oh no!  Did he really say his bachelor party?! 

You're not alone when those 2 simple words immediately conjure up images of your drunken fiancé surrounded by scantily clad women.  Most brides-to-be would rather plan 100 weddings than deal with their fiancé's bachelor party.  Calm down and give your beloved a little credit - you are marrying the guy, so you must trust him.  Bachelor parties are not always as bad as the horror stories you've heard.

Communication Goes a Long Way 

Instead of running to the best man and demanding for the party to be called off, sit down with your fiancé and talk about your feelings, your fears, and your concerns.  If the thought of your husband-to-be watching a roomful of dancing girls the night before your wedding night makes you feel a bit betrayed - let him know.  Ask him what the plans are for the night and discuss some limits that would make you feel more comfortable.  The bachelor party may be nothing more than a few guys, a couple kegs, and some action movies rather than girls and crowded bars.

Overcoming the Bachelor Party

If you're still not comfortable with the idea of a bachelor party, there are a few alternative options that will keep everyone happy.

  • Simultaneous parties. Weekend bridal party getaways are becoming quite popular with modern couples. Plan a bachelor and bachelorette weekend at a favorite destination. Schedule individual activities for the girls and the guys, as well as events for the entire group.
  • Groom's day out. An afternoon ball game, a day of paint ball, or a weekend fishing trip all sound more acceptable than a traditional bachelor party and most grooms prefer these tamer gatherings.
  • Jack and Jill. Skip the bachelor and bachelorette parties and opt for a fun couple's party with your closest friends. Dinner cruises, lake parties, and casinos make ideal locations or you could plan a simple barbecue.

You shouldn't have to drive yourself crazy trying to deal with the thought of your fiancé at a bachelor party.  If it truly bothers you, discuss an alternative with your future husband and he will more than likely respect your wishes.  If the bachelor party must go on - remember that they're usually not as bad as what you've seen on TV, then call up your bridesmaids for a girls' night out!

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MEMBER COMMENTS

11/14/2011 at 11:49 am

I am by no means insecure and trust my FI completely.  However, I am morally opposed to strip clubs and my FI is well aware of that.  He will not be going to a strip club for his bachelor party.  That was my only request, and he had the same request for me.  It wasn't a big debate or an issue.   

10/22/2011 at 10:48 pm

I agree with jennypaul87 ;) but also that this is not a place to judge others.....by all means share your feelings about this topic....but it's not right that WE should judge someone for having that feeling. I'm from SA - maybe we're different? But here the batchelor doesn't get a say so talking to him wouldn't help! I don't really mind what they do....it's more a tradition than anything else....I KNOW him and I KNOW his friends!! His best man is in charge of everything....and I trust that he won't let my FI get into trouble (and by that I mean chaining him naked to a post somewhere!!) I also know that his best man is not into strip clubs so that's not happening. I think by now your FI knows if you're really anti strip clubs or not....surely he'd keep that in mind? Personally I don't care!! I've been with him....I know it's not really his thing....lol....I don't expect him to come back from their weekend away sober!! Just as long as he has his eyebrows still and no stupid permanent stuff was done....I'd like him to have fun!!!

09/06/2011 at 08:44 pm

i think it's funny that my FI is more worried about my bachelorette night than i am of his, he says i do really weird things when i drink...so true! For his sake, we are thinking of just having a night out with friends so we can be crazy together...well, i'll be doing most of the crazy and he'll be there to keep me sane-) does that defeat the purpose of a bachelor/rette's night?...i wonder.

09/06/2011 at 08:38 pm

I could care less either way! I want my fiance to go out and have fun for his bachelor party. I trust him enough that I dont care. Do you really think that if he really wanted to cheat that he really wants to get married. Those are issues that need to be communicated between the man and woman. If you are that insecure about your fiance/ husband ... dont get married. The more restrictions you put on a man the more likely he will want to stray.

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Last Revision on Jan 24, 2010 at 11:13pm
by apax, jeanish
in Fashion & Beauty, Planning Basics, Wedding Party
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